Halfway There
by Confessed4Life
Summary: After being injured, Kahlan's relationship with Richard is strained and in an attempt to make it right, they are pulled farther apart. With Zedd's threat to send her away, they must fight to keep what they hold dear.
1. Chapter 1

The light of the moon lit the area around them, making it easy for her to watch him sleep. It was cold and though she was shaking, he laid handsomely still. He was shirtless, his chest pulling her attention as it rose with a breath, reminding her of the moment she watched him remove the blue fabric. He spilt a spoonful of the wizard's soup on the front and had been fighting ants for the first few minutes of lying down. It was she, who had suggested that he take of the shirt, saying that it would be a shame to have the Keeper win because he had been eaten by bugs.

Kahlan gritted her teeth together, trying to keep from waking him with the sound of their chattering. He looked warm and part of her longed to crawl into his arms and experience something simple and comforting. It was impossible, though to that part of her, it was all that mattered. His shoulders rolled back, making her freeze at the movement. Moving slowly, he rolled onto his left side, facing her as his arm came up to rest beneath his head.

She could hear Zedd eating, he was always finishing off their food during his watch in the middle of the night. He was the strongest force that kept her from inching into Richard's arms. Closing her eyes, she turned her head back to the sky and tried to find a thought to keep herself warm. It would be her watch soon and she found herself wishing for the time to come. Opening her eyes, she sighed quietly and turned her head for one last look.

Their eyes met instantly and before she could look away, he smiled widely. "Can't sleep?"

"No."

Moving his eyes over her, he began inching closer. "Are you cold?"

"The nights have been cooling."

Richard touched her cheek and quickly wrapped her in his arms. "You're freezing. Here," he added, pulling his blanket over them both. "I don't know how much this will help."

Pushing her nose against his chest, she closed her eyes and took in a deep breath of his scent. "Thank you."

His hands rubbed over her back, making her warmer with each stroke. "I'll take your watch, Kahlan. Try to sleep." When she didn't respond, he pulled back and looked at her. It was the first time in days he saw her asleep, somehow completely comforted by his embrace.

She was still in his arms when she awoke the next morning. He held her firmly against him and she wondered if he had moved during his watch. Turning her head away from his chest, she removed the pressure against her nose and fought to open her eyes against the rising sun. She wondered if she should pull out of his arms or if the action would wake him up. Settling for a different motion, she pulled herself closer and for a moment, allowed herself to believe this was the way they would always be.

"You've been shaking most of the night."

Kahlan started to pull away, but he stopped her instantly. "Did I keep you awake?"

"No," he said with a smile. "But I did everything I could to keep you warm."

"Thank you."

"I think we should ask Zedd to- Kahlan, if you're sick..."

"I'm fine, I promise."

Rolling her to her back, he moved to lay over her and gently touched his hand to her cheek. "You look exhausted. Try to get more sleep before the others wake up."

"I can't," she said with a small smile. "Someone has to clean your shirt before we head out."

"I can do it."

"Cutting the fabric to remove the stain isn't the same thing."

He chuckled, his thumb stoking her cheek. "If you'll rest, I promise that I will take proper care of it."

"Richard-"

"Kahlan, please?"

"I will try to rest, but I cannot promise."

Tightening the covers around her, he smiled. "I'll take it."

He left her side with hesitation, the paleness of her skin causing him to worry more and more. It took him a few minutes to clean his shirt, long enough for their friends to awaken and pack their belongings. Kahlan didn't move other than the quiver of her body from the cold only she felt. When the others were ready to go, the Seeker knelt down at her side and gently rocked her shoulder. She gave no sign of waking.

"Kahlan? It's time to go." He shook her shoulder again, harder this time, but again, she remained still. Pushing her hair out of her face, he leaned forward and listened to her breath. "Zedd!" Looking up, he looked to his grandfather and motioned for him to come to their aid. Without hesitation, Richard ripped open part of her dress and reached inside, running his hand over the front and side of her corset. The others were surprised to see blood on his hand as he pulled it free. "Spirits, Kahlan. Why didn't you say anything?" He ripped the dress from her body and pressed a portion of it against the hole in the leather. "Zedd, heal her!"

Laying his hand over her, the wizard closed his eyes and took in the wound. "It's infected. She must have received it many days ago."

"She never said anything. Zedd, we haven't fought anyone in almost a week. Where could she have-"

"She may have been caught on something in the river when she bathed." Bringing back his hand, the older man sighed. "I have removed the infection and sealed the wound. She may need a few minutes to regain her strength."

"You and Cara go on ahead of us. When she wakes up, we'll catch up to you."

"Richard-"

"I won't leave her here, Zedd. Go, you know the way and we'll follow your trail."

"If you haven't reached us by dark, we will come back for you."

Richard grinned widely, slapping his grandfather lightly on the shoulder. "I'd hope so."

Kahlan awoke with a jump, searching the area as she sat forward. He was sitting beside her, his hands ready to stable her as she took a moment to breath. The others had been gone over an hour and he was beginning to wonder if she had needed more from the wizard.

"How long did I sleep?"

"A few hours. I wasn't sure you were going to wake up. Zedd healed the cut." Her hand reached to her stomach, the exact spot she had been bleeding from, telling him that she had indeed known about it. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to slow us down. We're so close to finding the stone."

"What happened?"

Looking away from him, she frowned. "There was a baneling by the river."

"Kahlan-"

"I was fine, Richard. I killed him and came back."

Shaking his head, he touched her stomach and pushed. "You weren't fine, Kahlan. I could have- We could have lost you!"

Ignoring his words, she looked around them. "Where are they?"

"I told them to go ahead of us."

"You didn't have to stay."

"I wasn't going to leave you here, Kahlan. I would never go without you." Pushing away from him, she stumbled to her feet and looked around for her dress. Grabbing the white fabric off of the ground, she started to redress, but was forced to stop. "I had to get it off of you."

Throwing it into the small flames of the fire, Kahlan sighed in frustration. "We should hurry and catch them."

He bent down and lifted her dress out of the, now died out, flames. "Kahlan, I understand why you didn't tell them, but why didn't you tell me you were hurt?"

She turned, almost angrily, toward him and took a single step forward. "I do not have to report to you."

He started to move to her, but the hardened look in her eyes stopped him. "No," he agreed quietly. "You're right, but I thought we didn't have any secrets."

"We all have secrets."

"I don't. Not with you." Pushing her dress into his pack, he turned and began walking, never pausing for her to follow.

"What's wrong?"

Staring into the darkness, Kahlan shook her head to the old man's question. "Nothing."

"You two haven't spoken in hours and I don't think I've seen you two so far apart before."

"Isn't this what you've wanted?"

Sitting down, the wizard inched closer. "Kahlan-"

"I'm protecting him, Zedd."

"I know you would do anything to keep him safe, but I'm afraid this is not the best way."

"This is the only way." Meeting her friend's eyes, she frowned. "When he looks at me like that, I can't think straight. He shouldn't care so much about me, Zedd."

"We've told him, dear one. I believe it will take far more than this to change his mind. He's seen what you are capable of and it hasn't scared him away."

"It should."

Releasing a heavy sigh, he leaned closer. "It can't. He didn't know what you were when he met you. Kahlan, you allowed his feelings for you to grow before telling him the dangers. He cannot simply throw it away."

Staring out into the darkness, the brunette nodded slowly. "Neither can I. I'm not sure I'm doing the for him anymore. It hurts, Zedd."

"I know. Talk to him, it may help."

Meeting his eyes, she frowned. "If I tell him how I feel, it will only make things worse."

"It shouldn't keep you from trying."

"I can't-"

"Yes, you can. Go, he's gathering firewood, talk to him."

She saw him in the trees, no more than a few feet ahead of her, but she couldn't get her feet to move any closer. He was moving without pause, never once looking up in her direction, though she was sure he knew she was there. Her mind raced in every direction except the one she wanted it to. The taste of his kiss suddenly flooded her mouth, the memory of his embrace making her warmer by the second. She was almost panting as her desire for him grew wild around her body and demanded his presence. Turning away, she began walking as quickly as her legs would take her, not caring, in the slightest, where they took her.

Finding a darker area of trees, she shoved her back against a tree and slid down to the ground. The corset left some of her skin exposed to the bark, letting it scratch her as she pushed harder into it. The slight pain was welcome, giving her mind something else to fuel off of than the image it had of him laying above her. Shaking her head, she closed her eyes and took in a slow, deep breath. If the thoughts remained with her, she would never be strong enough to push him away.

Stretching out her legs, she prepared herself for another few minutes of silent turmoil, praying to the spirits that it would soon be over. He knew why she hadn't told him about the wound, but he wanted her to say it. If she said it aloud, their relationship would change, it would become more than it was and for her, it was already too much. She needed to protect him and not because he was the Seeker, but because she cared more about him than she did anyone. When she had been attacked by the baneling, she knew that there would be more coming and if they found him, their quest could come to an end.

Even now, she wasn't sure what had bothered her more, thinking he could have been killed or that the world would end without him. She wanted to think it was the latter, but her heart refused to believe.

"Zedd said you wanted to talk to me."

Her body stiffened for a minute, giving her a clear mind to feel the tears that fell down her face. Kahlan wiped them quickly, hoping he didn't see as he walked around her. "He is mistaken."

"That's what I told him. I'm going for a walk." She remained quiet and still as he began moving away, his eyes never coming to look at her directly. "You got what you wanted," he added after taking a few steps. Looking over his shoulder, he held a firm frown that saddened the rest of his features. "I will never push you again."

'I want you to.' She nearly shouted, catching herself instantly.

"You've been right this entire time. I'm foolish to have cared for you."

"And now you see," she replied through a whisper of pain that ripped open his skin. "A monster cannot be cared for."

"You're the only one who saw you that way."

"Until now." It was a simple answer, but spoken in a terrified voice.

He turned toward her completely, hating the trees for hiding her from the light of the moon. "I don't see you as a monster, Kahlan."

"Why not?"

"You don't need me to answer that." Before he knew it, he was stepping forward and without hesitation. "You're not a monster, Kahlan."

"You've seen my magic."

"And it should scare me, I know, but it doesn't." He kneeled down a few feet from her, neither of them knowing if they could handle anything more. "I've watched you confess men before and I- I've been confessed. I think about that, every day." She started to speak, but he continued too quickly. "I remember the way it feels, Kahlan, but it doesn't- it hasn't changed the way I feel about you. When I was confessed, I loved her as much as I've always loved you." He stood and turned away, making it easier for him to speak. "I know it frustrates you, I do, but each time you do this, shove me off of- You push me away and it doesn't make me hate you. I know it's what you want, but I don't. I can't. When I'm looking at you, I see the look in your eyes and I know that it hurts you more than it does me. I know you, Kahlan and I know that you would never hurt me."

"Richard-"

"You've had every chance to hurt me, but you hadn't. You won't." Taking another few steps, he paused for a moment and looked slightly over his shoulder at her. "I'm going to take that walk."

She waited a few hours before moving, waiting for the sting of the wind to grow wilder around her. Her hair stood on end, announcing the cold she felt. Coming to her feet, she started for their camp, but stopped herself after only a few steps. Richard hadn't passed her again and she couldn't keep her mind from wondering if he was alright. Turning on her heels, she began walking in the direction she had seen him go.

Reaching to the back of her shoulder, she pushed against the scrapes, stopping the small drops of blood from hitting the leather of her corset. His tracks were easy to follow, almost making her question if he had wanted her, at some point, to follow and find him. He hadn't gone as far as she thought, she found him no more than nine minutes from where she had started. He sat in the same position she had been in, his eyes closed.

"Did Zedd send you after me?"

"No." His eyes opened in confusion as she sat down next to him. "We both know what he would say if we didn't go back together."

"It wouldn't matter. He can't expect us to go back to the way it was before."

"Can we?"

"I don't know." Pulling up his legs, he crossed them before him and turned his head slightly to her. "I wouldn't think you'd want- I don't know if I can."

"Richard-"

"You can't tell someone you love them and then pretend it never happened."

"Why-"

"Because you can't make the feelings go away."

"I didn't want to hurt you."

He met her eyes with a nod. "I know, but you were right. It was the only way you could-"

"No it wasn't. Richard, I- it's not your feelings alone I was trying to change." She was staring down at the dirt, watching as a leaf landed smoothly. "I shouldn't feel this way, Richard. It's not safe for you."

"How can you say that? You would never hurt me, Kahlan."

"That's where you're wrong."

He turned, almost facing her completely. "I'm not wrong, Kahlan. Thinking about confessing me is not- You're not the only one who's thought about it. There have been times when I have wanted to grab your arm and be taken with the enemy."

"But you don't. You know what it would do to you."

He frowned as she looked into his eyes. He could see a light fog covering her eyes, hiding a bit of the blue in sadness. "That's not why I don't do it. Kahlan as much as I want to be with you, I could never do that to you. If you were to confess me, it would kill you. As many times as I've thought about it, it always comes back to that. I can't hurt you and I think that would be the deepest pain of all."

"Richard-"

"That is what's holding us back. We don't want to hurt the other in that kind of way, so we nick them with our knife. It hurts, but it's not the pain we could have."

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not," he said quietly, looking down to her hands while they twisted in her lap. "You want to protect me and we both know that you will do anything to keep me safe, even if it's from you. You're not sorry for having to do it."

Meeting his eyes, she swallowed her brains effort to convince her to run. "I'm sorry it hurts you."

He gave her a small smile, easing a portion of her disoriented body. "Me too." She continued to stare at him, her eyes seeming to be looking for something. "I'm not going to apologize for loving you," he added after a minute. "There are worse feelings I could have."

She chuckled at his words, her smile lightening his entire being. "I'm not sure I would agree."

He straightened his back with a quiet sigh, his eyes moving over her. "I'm afraid that not loving you would be a worse pain."

"You can't love me, Richard."

"Yes, I can. I do and I know that you feel the same way, I can see it in your eyes, in the sadness. We may not have the relationship that other people do, but Kahlan... It doesn't make what we have anything less."

She moved slowly, giving him a chance to pull away if he wanted to. Straddling his thighs, she pushed into him, their chests connected as they shared their breaths. "We can't have any of the things they can."

He leaned forward, grazing his lips against hers. "We have this."

"This can't give you a family."

He felt the weight of her words, it mixed with a pain he couldn't dissolve and with her eyes looking into his, it was stronger. "Maybe this is all we need."

Tears filled her eyes as she looked away. Pushing against his chest, she tried to move away, but he held her close. "And the day you wake up and realize you want- need more?"

He smiled in spite of himself, unable to keep it hidden as he voiced his thoughts. "Then I'll have to give you a daughter."

"Richard-"

"As Mother Confessor, it is your duty to give the world another and then maybe another."

She tried harder to move away, the thought he provided being more than painful. "We can never have children, Richard. You know that."

"You doubt the Seeker?"

A small smile snuck onto her lips before she could stop it. "I don't doubt you, Richard."

"But you don't think I can give you a daughter."

"No."

"Because you would confess me."

"Yes."

Rushing all of his fingers through her hair, he held her gaze and inched closer. "Try not to confess me."

She returned his kiss with hesitation, her hands taking hold of his shirt as he brought her closer. Feeling her caution, he trailed his lips over jaw and to her neck, sucking gently as her hands came to his hair. They had only done this a handful of times, but it had quickly become one of his favorite things. Her pulse quickened beneath his tongue, a quiet moan leaving her lips as his hands moved over the leather of her corset and over her shoulders. The contact of his hands on her skin pushed her onward, bringing her to pull his lips back to hers.

He took her action as permission to continue, his hold on her instantly tightening until their was no space between them. Pushing his tongue past her lips, he battled with hers until she surrendered without care. Richard fought his instincts to lean forward and bring her to the ground, knowing that the moment her back touched the cold ground, all reason would flood her mind and she would stop him. Keeping her close, he laid back and submitted himself to her.

Her hair danced around his face, tickling and comforting him at the same time. Slipping his hands beneath the fabric of her dark green skirt, he slowly traced up the length of her thighs, massaging gently as she pushed into him. He wanted more of her, his desire fueled to the maximum with each kiss. She felt him beneath her, his body craving for more without demanding. Breaking their kiss, she sat forward and inched back.

His heart pounded in his ears as he stared down at her hands, slowly pulling open the laces of his pants. Her name left his lips in a breathless whisper, a failed attempt to tell her she didn't have to continue, but she didn't stop her fingers. He grabbed her shoulders as her hand reached inside, bringing her eyes to meet his as her fingers wrapped around him. A gasp of pleasure left his lips as she tugged, watching him for directions he couldn't help but give.

Holding her gaze, he reached for her, needing more contact to keep from exploding from the moment. Without hesitation, she leaned down and reconnected their lips, moving her hand over him in rhythm with their mouths. His chest heaved beneath hers, his body trying desperately to hold on as he imagined more. Breaking their kiss for a gasp of air, he reached between them and stilled her hand, his eyes squeezed shut as she panted softly above him.

"Am I doing something wrong?"

"No," he managed to whisper before opening his eyes. "Spirits no, but Kahlan, you don't have to do this."

Confused and embarrassed, she released him and moved away, doing her best to avert her eyes. "I'm sorry."

He was on top of her within seconds, his lips pressed against hers as he lifted the bottom of her skirt. Her head jerked back as he touched her, her eyes opening wide to reveal the darkness of her magic as she gasped. She was more than ready for him, her body experiencing a pleasure she had never known.

"This may hurt you."

She managed a small nod before her eyes fell closed and her fingers began digging into his sides. He pushed forward, connecting them just slightly before rethinking. Flipping their positions, he grabbed her hips and slowly guided her onto him. They paused as a painful moan softly left her lips, Richard trying his best to keep from taking over and tearing through her. She didn't stop as he thought she was going to, instead, she shifted her legs and allowed him to fill her completely.

His head pushed back into the ground, her name on his tongue. Kahlan tried to remain still, her body beginning to act on instinct. Her breath warmed his neck as she struggled for air, afraid to lift her head and meet his eyes. Magic flooded through her, crying for release and threatening to let go without her. Her hips rolled slowly, so slowly, she wasn't sure she would make it through. He tightened his hold on her hips, his own rising slightly as she gasped in his ear.

Following his lead, she lifted herself and then met his hips again and again, the action driving her to continue without pause. Lifting her head, she grabbed his face and connected their lips, kissing him passionately until they had no other need. She bit his lip and he returned the favor, nipping hers just before sucking away the pain.

Breaking their kiss, Richard dug his fingers into her hip and gasped for air. "Kahlan, I- I can't hold on much longer."

Nudging her forehead and nose against his, the Mother Confessor nodded. "It's alright. What do you need?"

Her words were enough, but he refused to let it end that way. He was rougher than he intended, but she didn't seem to mind. Their mouths reconnected as he yanked her down, a united moan passing between them as he bruised her porcelain skin with his fingers. With his body shaking, he tried to provide her with more. Pushing one of his hands against her breast, he tried to grab hold through the leather, but found it nearly impossible. She smiled against his lips, her own hand coming to his to hold it in place as she gave her hips another roll.

Pushing his head back, he let go with a low growl and a series of spasms. Moving quickly, he rolled them to their sides and slipped from her warmth. Breathing heavily, he tried to keep her in his arms, but she wouldn't allow it. He watched as she fixed her skirt and then paused, her head turning to look at him. Without hesitation, she began removing her corset and within seconds, she laid down beside him and pulled at his shirt until he pulled it over his head. He was still breathing through gasps and the sudden connection of their chests did nothing to help him.

He knew what she wanted and without pause, he tried to give it to her. He moved his hands over her back, bringing her closer while their lips found each others once again. They clung to each other as they kissed frantically, neither caring about anything other than the feel of their embrace.

"Richard," she panted after several minutes. "We have to get back."

"I don't want to let go of you."

"They can't find us like this."

Bringing back his head, he grinned and met her eyes. "They wanted us to make up." He wiped his thumb beneath her bottom lip, removing some of the blood that had come from his bite.

"Richard..."

"The minute we move, we have to pretend this never happened, don't we?"

"They can't know."

"It's fighting you right now, isn't it? Your magic wants to be freed."

"I-"

"I know, Kahlan. You would never confess me, but I see the struggle in your eyes and it's hard on you. It's taking almost everything you have to hold on, your- your nose is starting to bleed."

She sat forward and turned away from him, wiping her face quickly. "I'm sorry."

"Do you want me to help you with the corset?"

"Yes, please, but I think I need a few moments to control myself."

"Take all of the time you need. I'll still be here."

There was a few minutes of near silence, the only sound was the deep breaths coming from her lips as she tried to gain full control of her magic. She knew how close she had been, how thin the rope had been for her to hold onto, but as the magic flowed through her blood, settling at her fingertips; threatening to destroy anything she touched, she hated herself for putting him in danger. He didn't touch her and she knew why, but a part of her wished he would because it was the only thing she could think of that would comfort her. No matter how bad things seemed to get, a single touch from him was more than enough to ease away it all. He had a way with people, but with her, she felt like he was the only one who could make her feel safe just by being near.

"Kahlan, are you alright?"

"Nearly."

He came to her side quietly, wrapping his right arm around her shoulder. "You're shaking."

"If I release it, Cara and Zedd will feel it."

"I'll tell them you were trying to scare me." He smiled as she met his eyes in a sadness. "We fought, words were exchanged, I hit you..." Touching his left index finger to her lip, he frowned for a moment.

"And I hit you back?" she questioned with a growing smile of her own.

"And just to make your point, you released your magic into the night air."

"There's a problem with your plan."

"What?"

"You would never hit me."

"I was angry."

She chuckled and reached for her corset. "They would never believe it. We will have to come up with a different story to tell."

"We made up and lost ourselves for a moment."

Turning away from him, she pulled the straps of her corset over her shoulders. "Will you help me?"

His hands circled her waist, pulling her back to his chest as his lips came to her shoulder. She didn't stop him, though he was sure the thought came to her mind as his fingers slipped beneath her leather and came to her breasts. Tilting her head to the side, Kahlan granted him more access with a long moan. His name left her lips in warning, bringing his actions to a slow stop.

"I'm sorry."

He smiled into the skin of her shoulder and tightened his hold on her. "Me too. I didn't want to stop."

"That's not what I meant."

"I know." Giving her a final kiss, he brought his hands to the lacing of her corset. "I won't guarantee this will be done correctly. I don't see how you have..." He was pulling at it in confusion, trying to understand how it had been done before.

"Start at the top and cross down."

"It seemed easier when you removed it."

"It is," she laughed. "Sometimes, when I know we're going to be passing by a river or lake, I ask Cara not to knot it at the bottom. One pull and it falls-"

He tied a small bow at the bottom of her corset and wrapped his arms around her. "I'll have to remember that."

"Richard..."

"They don't have to know, Kahlan. We haven't done anything wrong."

"We can't-" She took a step forward and crossed her arms as she turned toward him. "We can't do this again. Richard, we can't fool ourselves into thinking we can have this life. I'm a Confessor, I- As much as I would give to be able to give you-"

"Answer one question, Kahlan and I will do what you want and pretend this didn't happen."

"Alright. What's your question?"

"If we could have that life, would you take it with me?"

She straightened her back as she took in a breath and smiled weakly. "Without hesitation."

He kissed her at once, but quickly pulled back, doing his best not to upset her. "I promise to give that life to you. Someday Kahlan, I'll be yours."


	2. Chapter 2

Zedd was humming when the Seeker awoke, happily stirring something he had created in a pot above the fire. Kahlan was still asleep beside him, he knew she would be, considering how exhausting the night before must have been for her. Laying his blanket over her, he came to his feet and walked toward his grandfather.

"How's your lip?"

"It's fine."

"You two mustn't do that again, Richard. It's dangerous."

"I know it's dangerous, Zedd. Kahlan told me the same thing."

"Before of after the kiss?"

"Both." Leaning over the pot, Richard took in a deep breath. "Smells delicious."

"Of course it does!" Zedd said cheerfully before his smile faded. "You two were gone for hours, Richard. That kiss-"

"Was all that happened, Zedd. We didn't speak for a while, neither of us willing to end the silence first."

"Richard-"

"I'm not wrong to have feelings for her and no matter what you believe, she won't hurt me. At least, not in the way you both fear." Looking over his shoulder, he looked at the sleeping brunette and smiled. "She'd do anything to protect me, even if it killed her."

"Is that what you want for her? Richard, you may love her, but holding onto her may not be the best thing for either of you. She can wait for you to find a way to be with her for the rest of her life, but if that day never comes, she will pass on to the underworld without living a life of her own."

Returning his eyes to the older man's Richard frowned. "You're saying my feelings for her are holding her back?"

"Maybe not now, but when she returns to Aydindril and has to take a mate, she's not going to be able to go through with it. She's not going to want to hurt you. She's the last Confessor, Richard and she has a duty to her people. They need her to create more and protect them."

"And she can't do that if she's waiting for me."

"Are you angry with me?"

The soft sound of Kahlan's voice pulled him out of his thoughts and brought his fast pace to a stop. "What? No. Why would you think-"

"This is the first time you've spoken to me all day."

Richard looked around them at the darkening sky, realizing the time as he saw his grandfather struggling to catch up to them. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize- It was sunup a few minutes ago."

"Are you alright?"

"Fine," he answered quickly, making sure he didn't look into her eyes as he lied. "We should find a place to set up camp."

"Cara's already searching the area." Grabbing his hand, she stepped closer and ignored the disappointed look on the wizard's face. "Richard, what's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Lowering her voice, she stared into his eyes. "Is this about last night? Was that all you wanted from me?"

He saw the hurt in her eyes and knew exactly what was going on in her mind. This was the moment he had been thinking of all day. His answer, if he gave the right one, would ruin everything the had fought for and would, in all likelihood, break her heart. "Kahlan-"

Releasing his hand, she stepped back and blinked rapidly to hold back her tears. "No..." Dropping her eyes to the ground, she turned away from him just as Zedd reached them. "I'll find Cara and help with the rest of the search."

"Are you alright, dear one?"

"I'm fine, just tired. I think we moved a little too fast today."

Before he could respond, she was walking away, nearly running with her speed, but he didn't try to stop her. Instead, he looked to his grandson, who held a firm and emotionless face.

"What happened?"

"I let her go."

Shaking his head, Zedd came closer. "I saw the look on her face, Richard and that wasn't from a simple release. It looked like you took something from her." The older man sighed heavily and came forward, grabbing the other man's shoulders. "Last night, when you were with her-"

"Let it go, Zedd! It doesn't matter what happened last night, I let her go! She's free to have-"

"It matters! Have you lost your mind?! Do you have any idea what you've done?!"

"She didn't confess me."

Folding his arms, the wizard shook his head in disappointment. "Did you truly give it no thought?"

"Wh-"

"She is the Mother Confessor and she has- had yet to take a mate. Confessors do not simply take a man, Richard and she will face severe consequences for what the two of you have done. If she conceived a child-"

"I was with her one time, Zedd and she didn't-"

"A Confessor's magic does not need to be released in order for her to conceive a child." Turning away from his grandson, Zedd began walking toward the firelight in the trees. "I can't imagine it was an easy decision for her, we both know how she feels about you." Looking over his shoulder, he paused his steps. "You need to go find her."

"What am I supposed to say? I pushed her away, just like you said I should."

"Pushing someone away, does not mean breaking every piece of them. You owe her an explanation and so much more."

"Kahlan?"

She turned without hesitation, her eyes still wet with her tears. "I have nothing left to give you."

"Kahlan-"

"Please, just go."

"I can't." He sat down beside her, ignoring the way she leaned away and cringed. "Kahlan, I realized something today and when you asked me- Kahlan I was ready to have you spend the rest of your life waiting for me to find it. I was going to find a way to be with you and I didn't care how long it took." Richard looked ahead of them, watching the waves of the river rush over the image of the moon. "But you have your own life you have to live. When we seal the rifts, you'll go back to Aydindril and we were fooling ourselves to think that would be the end of it. You're the Mother Confessor and we both know what is expected of you."

He looked over to her just in time to see a set of tears leak from the corners of her eyes and down her cheeks. The night was cool and the breeze that brushed by them seemed to add to the pain she felt within. She wasn't sobbing, like he thought she would be, but she was stronger than anyone he knew and the tears that streamed down their face, told him just how much she hurt. She didn't cry often, but it wasn't the only thing that broke him with every breath. She had a pain in her eyes, one he had never seen in anyone before. It was sharp, but dull and wide to ensure the pain.

"I know you, Kahlan," he added after a moment of silence. "How can you have a life if you're waiting on me?"

"And you've made the decision?"

"I had t-"

Her fist slammed into his face before he could finish his thought. "You don't get to decide on your own! This is not your life alone! Not after what we did last night." She started to hit him again, but he grabbed her arm. "How dare you-"

"There is nothing you can say that can make me feel worse than I already do."

She tilted her head and yanked her arm free, slapping her hand across his chest before pushing him to the ground as she straddled his waist. "Make you feel worse? How do you think I feel?!" Her fists thumped against his chest twice before she slouched forward in tired defeat. "How do you think I feel? Richard, I-"

"I know," he whispered up to her, catching her gaze. "Kahlan, last night was... You were... Kahlan, you were- I'm sorry I made you feel like you were-"

"Disappointing," she said softly, darting her eyes to the ground.

He reached up to her face and cupped her cheeks. "I wish that was the worst I made you feel. I didn't want to hurt you, Kahlan." Dropping his hands to her hips, he held her to him firmly, his mind replaying the night before. "I never wanted to make you feel like you meant nothing to me." She started to move off of him, but stopped as his hands tightened on her. "Don't, please. I know I hurt you and you have every right to want to get away from me, but I-" Letting go of her, he dropped his hands to the ground and continued to stare up at her. "I am sorry, Kahlan. I should have thought it through. I shouldn't have allowed myself to think about this without you."

"You told Zedd, didn't you?"

"I think he already knew."

Her head tilted to the right, the way it did when she was disappointed or sad, her hair falling over her shoulder. "You're here because he told you that I may be with child, aren't you?"

"Kahlan-"

He was too fast for her, his hands grabbing her waist before she could remove herself from him. "Let go, Richard." Meeting his eyes, she pulled on her Confessor's face and swallowed her pain. "If I am with child, I will not hold you accountable. You will have no obligation the child."

"And if I wanted to be her father?"

"Why would you?" she asked sincerely. "We laid together once, there is no man who would want a child to come from that."

"I would. I do," he said instantly, almost surprising her. She knew the kind of man he was and knew that if she had indeed conceived a child, he would make certain that he was there to help whenever he was needed. "Kahlan, think about it," he said with a sly grin. "If we created a child, you couldn't get rid of me." She nearly laughed as she nodded, understanding where he was leading her. "We would have everything and all of the time in the world to be together. Yes, most men don't want a child with a woman they spent one night with, but that is only because they don't love them. A child would hold them to the mother and in our case, I pray-"

"Don't," Kahlan interrupted sadly, her emotions flooding through her. "Richard, you can walk away from this. You can go home and find a wife. You can have the life you're imagining."

"I want it with you and I know that you think that it's impossible, you all do, but that doesn't make me want it any less. I can try to push you away and hurt you, but we both know that it would be a matter of time before I came running back to you. It doesn't matter if we can't be together, not to me. I want a life with you and I will take it however it comes." He paused for a moment, trying to read her as she stared back at him. "I choose you, but I'm afraid- Kahlan, I know you would never choose me."

"Richard..."

"You can't find the words because it's true. No matter how much you cared about me, you would never take me, but last night, I'm not so sure. I saw it in your eyes, how close you came to letting go. I nearly held you so tight you would have had no choice but to let go. I wanted to."

"I was afraid, for a moment, that you were going to."

He smiled wildly and brought his hands to her hips, pulling her against him just slightly. "We could do it again." He stopped as her face hardened, knowing what she was thinking. "If you are with child, I would like to stay and be a part of her life, in any way I can."

"I wouldn't keep you away."

Holding out his hand, he tried to find a serious face. "Mother Confessor, I believe we have an agreement."

Shaking his hand, she smiled warmly, almost removing all of the pain in her eyes. "Lord Rahl." When their hands parted, Kahlan brought her eyes to the ground. "How angry was he?"

"Not as angry as I thought he would be. He was more upset with the pain I had caused you. I think he secretly wants a great granddaughter." She didn't smile like he thought she would, but then again, it wasn't an entirely happy subject for her. "He knows that you would never hurt me, Kahlan."

"I hit you," she said softly.

"And you're very sorry for that."

The smile on her face grew without care, matching his. "I am?"

"Oh, yes. You regretted it the instant my blood touched your knuckles."

"It may have been a few moments later."

"What do you mean a few mo-"

"We should head back before Zedd sends Cara after us."

"He won't," Richard told her through a whisper, his eyes moving over her slowly. "As far as he knows, we're fighting."

"You shouldn't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you did last night."

Bringing his eyes back to hers, he tried to catch his breath. "It's hard not to." His hand came to the front of her stomach, his palm flattening against the leather as he imagined the feel of her skin. "I don't think you realize how beautiful you are." Sliding his hand up, he traced his fingers over the edge of the corset along her breasts. "One pull, Kahlan."

"Richard..."

Grabbing the lacing, he slowly began to pull. "You can stop me."

She heard the sincerity in his voice, his eyes never leaving hers as she remained still and allowed him to continue. When the corset was loose, he held it to her and waited for her to stop him. Her movement surprised him, her hands moving around his arms and pulling at his shirt, giving him all of the permission he needed to continue. Yanking his shirt over his head, he returned his hands to he leather and slowly removed it from her body.

Richard brought his hands back to her stomach and traced his thumbs around the edge of her skirt before sliding his rough hands up the smooth skin of her sides. He craved her breasts, but couldn't bring himself to move too quickly, though his eyes could barely look away. He had seen a handful of women naked before, but none came close to the beauty of the woman before him. Gliding his fingers around her shoulders, he paused and suddenly dropped his hands. It was her turn.

She hesitated, at first, but once he brought her hands to his chest, she grew braver. His skin was soft, but hard, his muscles flexing beneath her touch. The action made her feel as though she was a different woman, attractive and fearless. After tracing the index finger of her right hand around the Keeper's mark, she cupped his cheek, running the pad of her thumb across the stubble.

Leaning down, she kissed him, releasing a soft moan as her chest flattened against his. He wasted no time wrapping his arms around her, making sure she was as close as possible. She was gentle with the kiss, easing around his newly swollen and slightly bloody bottom lip. Their bodies pulled at each others, trying to mold together without care as their need grew. Richard rolled over her, sliding his hands between them for another feel.

Arching her back, she pushed into him. He gave her chest all of his attention, his mouth slowly making its way down. Her fingers threaded through his hair, pulling gently every few seconds as his lips reached new territory. She tried to keep quiet, holding in the urge to purr his name in pleasure and beg him to never stop. He circled her breasts slowly, running his tongue smoothly between the two globes.

His mouth returned to hers, his tongue instantly welcomed by her own. He rocked forward, an action she was thrilled to receive, but frightened by the reaction she wanted to give him. Her hips rolled forward against him, a silent welcome he didn't rush to take.

Breaking their kiss, Richard bumped his nose against her chin and waited for her eyes to meet his. "We don't have to do this, Kahlan."

Her eyes were dark, her magic rising within her as she allowed herself to fully feel the weight of him above her. "And if I wanted to?"

"Do you?" he asked through a heated whisper.

"I might."

"That's not an answer."

Gliding her hands over his back, she stared at his lips, finding them easier to look at without feeling guilty for the images in her mind. "It's the only safe answer."

"I don't want to hurt you, Kahlan."

"I know." Returning her eyes to his, she lowered her arms and licked her lips. "We shouldn't..."

He lifted himself from her at once and moved to sit before her. "We don't have to, Kahlan."

Sitting forward, she hesitantly crawled onto his lap. "I'm sorry, Richard."

Letting his arms circle her waist, he gave her a small smile and leaned forward, brushing his lips lightly against hers. "It's alright, I understand."

"Would you mind if we sat like this for a while?"

"No."

He held her for an hour, their lips connecting again and again as their chests remained together through each gasp for breath. The wind picked up and her hold on him tightened, using him to keep her chest warm. The air blew past her back, making her jump into him before breaking their kiss with an apology.

"Do you want to put your corset on?"

Grinning, Kahlan pulled on his shoulders. "No. I can think of something else that can keep me warm."

"Spirits, Kahlan," he whispered into the air as she moved them so that he laid above her. "We shouldn't lay like this."

"You don't want me to freeze do you?"

"No," he answered quickly, his left hand snaking between them to cup one of her breasts. "But I don't think I can stop this time."

"I don't want you to."

"Maybe you should hit me again. If you did, we won't have to say anything when we return."

"Because you'd have a broken nose," she said through a soft laugh.

Richard stood behind her, lacing her corset, faster than the night before. She could barely stand straight, her body swaying in exhaustion. "You don't have to hit me that hard."

"Don't I?" she teased with a glance over her shoulder. "They won't believe it any other way." Turning into his arms, she smiled and brought her right index finger to trace the bridge of his nose. "Zedd will be able to heal it."

"Why does it seem like you are looking forward to hitting me?"

"I held back the first time."

Laughing, Richard stepped back with a nod and stiffened his back. "Alright, I'm ready. Hit me and then release your magic."

"Richard-"

"Trust me, Kahlan."

"What-"

"You won't be able to stand by yourself for much longer, if you release your magic, they'll think you were angry and overworked yourself. They won't blink when I carry you back."

"I can walk back, Richard."

"Alright. If you can stand when this is done, I'll let you walk back."

She swung instantly and without warning, slamming her fist into his face. "I'm sorry, I thought it would hurt less if you didn't know when it was coming."

The Seeker fell to the ground, grabbing his nose as he bent over with a cough. "Thank you." Straightening his back, he forced a smile when he stumbled back to his feet and blinked back the tears in his eyes. "It still hurt, though."

Reaching out to him, she pulled back his hand and leaned in close. "It's definitely broken," she said as she touched her index finger against the skin.

"Ouch!"

"Sorry, I was just making sure."

"By poking it?"

"We should wait another few minutes to make sure it bleeds a little more."

"Only one thing left to do, Kahlan."

"Richard, I don't want to."

Taking three steps backward, he nodded toward her with a small smile. "I won't touch you, I promise."

Turning away from him, she closed her eyes and let her magic tear through her. Dropping to her knees, she sucked in a deep breath and gasped as her vision grew blurry. He had he right, she knew he would be, but a part of her wished he didn't have to rush to her side before her world went black.


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm surprised you have the energy to open your eyes." Looking up from the fire, Kahlan met the wizard's eyes. "I didn't expect you to wake until the afternoon."

"I suppose I shouldn't have."

"Would you like some tea?"

Shaking her head, she looked back to the fire. "No. Zedd, I-"

"It's too late to apologize, dear one. I understand the temptations the two of you have faced, but-"

"No, you don't." Returning her eyes to his, she frowned. "I don't think you ever could. Zedd, I don't think that anyone can because they're- you're not us."

"Kahlan-"

"You can't understand, Zedd. You can't know how it feels to be so close to someone and all you want to do is lose yourself in them, but you can't because the instant you touch them, they're destroyed. You don't know what it's like to love someone so much and know that with a single breath, you'd destroy them. Please, do not sit there and tell me that you understand, not when you've made it clear how you feel about us."

"Kahlan-"

"It's too late to lecture me, Zedd. It won't change anything, not now."

He studied her face, trying to find the answers he was looking for. "If you carry his child-"

"Don't worry, Zedd. If I am with child, I won't tell him until we've sealed the rifts."

"You will never tell him, do you understand? You will not do that to him, trap him in some, weak life with you."

Hardening her face, she straightened her back like a predator as it attacked its prey. "You have no say in the decision, wizard. I will not keep that from him and you have no right to tell me to do so. If I am carrying his child, as difficult as it will be, I will-"

"You will not tell him, as a Wizard of the First Order, I command you to keep it to yourself."

Kahlan blinked in frustration, her body trembling with a cross between fury and sadness. "How can you order me to do such a thing? If he found out-"

"He won't find out. When we seal the rifts, you will excuse yourself from our group and return to Aydindril. You will then claim your mate and waste no time bringing him to your bed. The world and Richard will believe the child is that of your mate."

"You know that is not that simple. If the council learns I am with child before I take a mate, they will take her from me." Swallowing, she hardened her eyes and leaned forward. "If I am pregnant, I will not let them take the only piece of him I have."

Matching the coldness of her eyes, Zedd too, leaned forward. "If you give one word to him of the child, I will write the council."

"If you speak a word to them, I will hold onto Richard."

"This is not game, Kahlan!" he shouted, waking the others, who jumped instantly. Richard's eyes found her and watched as she stared at his grandfather across the fire. The two of them appeared to be in the middle of a bloody battle and neither showed signs of weakness or giving in. "You will do as ordered or you will return in the morning."

"You cannot send me away. It is not your decision."

"I will protect my grandson."

"You can try."

"Kahlan?" Richard's voice made her jump, his breath close to her ear. "What's going on?"

"The wizard wishes me to take a mate."

She had to grab his arm to hold him back, the urge to rush to his grandfather in their defense overwhelming him. "How dare you! You cannot send her away! You can't force her to be with another man!"

Standing, the older man motioned to the Confessor. "It is their way, Richard. You cannot understand because you are too close. If she does not take a mate, her race will die."

"Each one of us know that is not why you are ordering this of her! How can you tell her to do this when you know how we feel about each other!"

"I do this to protect you! I must because you cannot control yourself! You were willing to risk your life to bury yourself with her for a single moment!"

"I assure you, it was longer than a moment." The forest seemed to quiet, in shock, immediately as the words left her lips and she came to her feet. "If you threaten me again, I will not be so forgiving."

"Kahlan, wait!" Richard called after her as she began walking toward the trees. When she didn't stop, he turned to his grandfather and crossed his arms. "What happened?"

"I was having a discussion with the Mother Confessor."

"You mean, you were giving orders to Kahlan."

"She is not Kahlan alone, Richard. You must understand who it is you are lying with. She has responsibilities and it is her duty to take a mate."

"I could give her a child, Zedd! I could-"

"Waste your life trying to be with her. Richard, this is for the best. She will leave and she will take a mate. You cannot have a life with her."

"Who are you to decide?" The Seeker's voice was surprisingly calm as he looked upon his friend in pity. "I know you think my life is something worth protecting, but it's not her you should protect me from. I don't need to be protected from her love. I've looked into her eyes, begged her to confess me and she wouldn't. I watched as her magic seemed to eat at her and she withheld it from me. As far as I am concerned, she cares more about me than you do. I know what she can do to me, Zedd, but she would never hurt me. I laid above her, on the edge of my own sanity and she held on, telling me she how much she loved me. It's a feeling that is new to the both of us, strong and full of dangers, but I wouldn't want anything else. You do not get to send her away, not only because I love her, but because I need her. She is the reason I do this, not to save the world and spare it from the Keeper, but because if anything happened to her, we all might as well be dead." Looking to the blonde, he gave a small smile. "I'm going to find Kahlan, would you mind taking my watch?"

"Of course."

She was sitting on the back of her legs in tall grass, running her fingers through the green blades. The moonlight was mostly hidden behind the thick branches of the trees, but he could see her as well as as he could in the sunlight. The streaks of her tears stained his cheeks and from the amount, he knew she had let herself feel the worst of the pain. She shifted her head toward him, acknowledging his presence without a sound. Words were nowhere to be found, though her mind was spinning in thought. He sat down beside her and took hold of her hand, instantly slowing both of their heart beats.

Their fingers locked tightly around the others, their eyes staring ahead of them into the darkness of the night. As his hand tightened, she turned her head toward him just in time to see him fighting his own tears. She reacted instantly, taking her hand from his and cupping his face in both of hers, wiping her thumbs beneath his eyes to catch the small set of tears. "We didn't mean to wake you."

"I won't let him send you away, Kahlan."

"I know," she nodded with a half smile. Dropping her hands, she sighed in defeat. "Richard, what if he's right?"

"He's not."

"I don't want him to be right-"

"But you can't stop wondering if he could be."

Lying back, the Seeker opened his arms and waited for her to lay down. Flattening her hand on his chest, she rested her chin on the top and looked down at him. "I don't want it to be wrong to feel this way, Richard. After everything we've been through, when I'm with you... Remember when you were a kid and you'd spend all day doing something, anything that you loved, that feeling your have and the day was over?"

"A happiness that seemed to wipe out everything bad."

"Exactly."

With a light chuckle, he hugged her to him and nodded. His mind came back to a question he had wanted to ask before, but knew she needed another few moments to let it sink in. "What did he say to you?"

"Probably the same thing he has said to you."

"We both know that's not true. I saw the look in your eyes, he said something that hurt you."

Tearing her eyes away from his, she laid her head down on his chest. "He didn't want me to tell you if I was pregnant."

"That's silly," he told her quietly, knowing that there was more she needed to tell him.

"If I am pregnant, I am to return to Aydindril and take a mate to keep the council from knowing what we have done."

He was confused by her words, believing that her duty was to have a child and if he had helped her with that, they should be happy for her. "Why would you not want them to know? Kahlan, if we-"

"I'm the Mother Confessor. Because I have to take a mate, it is expected of me to take one the council approves of."

"What do you mean?"

Lifting her head, she smiled weakly down at him. "Not every Confessor can take any man she wishes. As Mother Confessor, I- I had never been with a man before," her voice lowered in, from what he could tell, embarrassment as she continued. "The council would want me to be with a man they were alright with. They have probably already collected a handful of men they wish me to consider."

"Why?"

"A Confessor chooses her mate for a reason."

"And if you were to choose me?"

"I can't."

"Ignore your magic. Kahlan, if you weren't afraid of hurting me, what would be the reason you chose me?"

"Your strength, your heart..." Moving slowly, she touched his face and grinned. "Your smile, I'd hope that if we had a child, she'd have those parts of you."

"I want to give them to you." The smile left her lips, but she didn't pull away from him. Her body longed for his in a way she couldn't explain and after their two nights together, she found herself craving him all the more. Looking into his eyes, she could see his mind reeling on the same subject as hers and he gave no effort to hide it from her. "I will, if you'll allow me to."

"Richard..."

"I'll take care of you, Kahlan. I promise, Zedd will not send you away."

"If we keep doing this, he's going to have to. Richard, if I do become pregnant, there will be only a handful of choices we can make."

"We don't have to-"

"I want to, but..." Sitting up, she moved to sit above him. "I want to give you more."

"There is nothing more than you."

Kahlan gave him a warm smile and leaned down, instantly connected their lips. She knew the night couldn't end the way they wanted, but she was determined to give him what he had always given her.

"He's going to notice."

"Not unless you say something," Kahlan told her friend in a low voice. "I will tell him, I just... I need to find the right words first."

"It's not hard, Make him see how fat you've become."

"I have not-"

Cara chuckled, a sound rarely heard. "You've eaten everything in front of you for days and last night, you ate mine too."

"You said that you weren't hungry."

"If I hadn't, you would have eaten the dirt around you."

"I wouldn't have eaten the dirt, It would taste like something you've cooked."

Rolling her eyes, the blonde crossed her arms and turned her head toward the others who walked behind them. "Tell him before the wizard does."

"He knows?"

"I can't be sure without proper questioning."

Looking over her shoulder, Kahlan smiled kindly at the Seeker, who was quick to respond with one of his own. Richard was walking closer to them, still having trouble walking beside or even talking to his grandfather at times. He was angry in a way he had only felt before when holding his sword. When they were with the others, he stayed a short ways away from her, not wanting to upset the older man anymore than he already had to be sure he didn't send the woman he loved away.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Of course." He was at her side in the blink of an eye, his hand in hers. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I- I was just thinking... I know you're not going to like it, but I... I think I should go back to Aydindril."

He stopped walking, but he didn't seem angry like she thought he would. A smile coming to his lips as he yanked her into his arms. He hugged her tightly for a few seconds before pulling back and looking ahead of them as they continued to walk.

"I don't want you to go, Kahlan. I can protect you, both of you." He was whispering to keep his grandfather from hearing, though he was almost certain that he already knew. "I understand why you want to go back, but I- I don't want to be away from you."

"I know you can protect us, but I- I will be safer there. Richard, I don't want to risk losing her. I don't think I could survive that."

"If you leave, Zedd will-"

"I don't care what he thinks or does. Richard, this is between us. I need you to help me with this, I need you to tell me how you feel."

"I'm too happy to do anything, Kahlan. I don't want you to leave, but I know you're right. If we left you in Aydindril, you would be safer and there would be someone to look after you at every turn and- They may be able to protect you better than I can."

Grinning, Kahlan knocked her shoulder against his. "I think we both know that no one can protect me the way you can."

"Have you told him yet?"

"No. I wasn't sure myself until yesterday morning. I thought about keeping it to myself for a few days, try to see how far I could take this, but Cara said I was being sloppy."

"With dinner?"

"You noticed?"

Smiling, he nodded with his steps. "Yes. I don't think I've seen you finish your entire bowl and then you ate Cara's. I thought that maybe you were still regaining your strength after our time together." His smile widened to show more teeth, a laugh seeking an out as he looked over to her flushed cheeks. "I was going to suggest we take another walk, but you had already fallen asleep."

"You're not upset with me?"

"No," he replied quietly. "I understand, Kahlan. I can't imagine how you must have felt when you realized you were pregnant."

Watching the road ahead of them, she blinked with her thoughts. "I didn't think we would do it. I thought that the spirits were against us; then I woke up yesterday and I felt her."

"What did- does it feel like?"

Glancing over to him, she shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not sure there are words. It's comforting and warm, the way I feel when I'm lying in your arms. I keep expecting more, but I don't know what. I don't know how else to explain it."

"Does it feel that way now?"

"It does." Watching his face, she grinned at the jealousy she saw in his eyes. "I feel full, if you eat too much at lunch, you may feel the same way."

Chuckling, Richard shook his head. "Somehow, I don't think that would be near the way it feels for you."

"It might be close."

"Is it selfish of me to say that I don't want something close?"

"No." Squeezing his hand, she inched closer and nudged her shoulder to his. "I can understand the way you're feeling."

"The woman you love is carrying your child and you want to know what it feels like?"

"Not exactly."

"What do you want to feel?"

Staring down at the ground, she allowed him to lead her onward as she tried to find the right way to say what was on her mind. "There's a lot of things I wish as could feel."

"Can you give an example?"

"I want to know what it would feel like to be like you."

"To not have your magic?"

"I think about it more often than I should."

Smiling, he met her eyes for a moment. "Even the Mother Confessor is allowed to be curious. I like it when you-"

"Richard!" she said louder than she intended. "We shouldn't talk about that, not like this."

"No one else will hear us. They never do." Looking around them, he made sure neither of their friends were close, easing her mind at once. "I like your curiosity."

"I... ," she replied embarrassed.

It had been a few days since they had laid together and it still echoed in her mind as though it had just happened. He had allowed her to do as she pleased, discover his body in a way no one had ever done. It replayed in her mind every minute, the way he laid perfectly still as her hands and mouth covered his body. He trusted her completely, though he knew what she could do to him. He watched as her mouth ran over him, anticipating each moment of contact as she discovered him.

Tossing her a side smile, Richard raised his eyebrows. "I'm not complaining, Kahlan."

"Would you?"

"If there was need, I would tell you. Spirits, I don't think you realize just how- Ouch!"

Her elbow pushed into his side, stopping his words before they could fully form. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I should not have tried to embarrass the Mother Confessor."

"You're not going to help me decide, are you?"

"I don't feel it's my place, Kahlan. How can I offer any advice when all I want is to keep you with me?"

"There's nothing wrong with that Richard, but I need your help. This is not a decision I should make on my own." He watched a smile come to her lips as she brought her eyes to the road ahead of them. "It's alright if you wish to be a little selfish."

"I intend to be entirely selfish when it comes to you."

"I know what you're going to say Zedd."

"No," the older man said quietly. "I do not believe that you do. I know how you feel, Richard. It is a great honor to have a child growing within the woman you love. It's a feeling that can overwhelm oneself in a happiness that can't be matched." The Seeker stared at his grandfather in disbelief, his comforting tone surprising him. "I know how happy you are and how much you want to keep her close, but-"

"You don't think that I should?"

"No, but not for the reason you believe. I've been watching the two of you for weeks. The nights you left us to spend in the forest alone, were not spent in the way I had thought and I am sorry for my words. Richard, I was trying to protect you."

"I know, but you don't need to-"

"You two were just as content to be near and I realized that there isn't a force in existence that can tear you two apart." Eating a sliver of rabbit meat, the wizard looked over his grandson's shoulder at the women, who talked quietly. "If she stays, there is a greater chance of something taking the child from you. There is only so much protection we can provide and the prophecy of her life- Richard, she will be better protected in Aydindril."

"And when they learn she's with child? Zedd, I will not send her back knowing what they could do to her."

"She told you?"

Nodding, Richard sighed. "She's never kept anything from me. I know she will be safer in her home, but I'm afraid that I cannot do this without her."

The wizard smiled, yet another surprise to the younger man. "You are not doing this without her, Richard. You are doing it for her and your child. I will help with the council, if you two decide she will return."

"How?"

"I am the witness to her actions. She has claimed you, the council cannot have a word in on the matter."

"Why would you help us?"

Shrugging his shoulders, Zedd licked his lips. "I want you to be happy and I can see that she is the only one who can make that happen. Richard, there will come a day when her magic will release, you know this as well as I and when it does, you will be lost."

"No, I won't. Zedd, you once told me that there is no magic more powerful than love. Her magic is love, and as I understand it, it can't make me love her anymore than I already do. My being is hers and I want nothing more than that. When that day comes, I will hold her gaze and prove my love for her. I have no fear of her magic."

"Richard-"

"I know that it's hard for you to see, but to me, her magic... When her eyes darken and her heart quickens, the glaze that covers the blue of her soul, it's beautiful and I swear to you that it calls out to me. It whispers my name, caressing my body in a warmth I've never felt before and in the moment when she's about to lose control and our eyes meet, we are connected in a way that I wish the world could experience. My whole life I have believed love to be something far less than this. I am hers, Zedd and she is mine. There is nothing else."

"I pray you are right, Richard."

Beaming at the wizard, the younger man nodded enthusiastically. "I am and you'll see."

"The two of you should discuss this. Go, Cara and I will stay here and keep watch."

"Thank you, Zedd. I know that this isn't easy for you."

"It's easier than you think. I care a great deal about Kahlan as well. Your happiness means more than my fear."

With a nod, Richard put down his plate and turned toward the women. "You're going back to Aydindril with a letter from Zedd."

Kahlan froze, mid-bite at his words. "What?"

"It will keep you both safe and to ensure it, Cara's going with you." The blonde dropped her bowl to the ground with an annoyed sigh. "I need you to watch after her. If anything happens, I know you'll be able to protect them."

"Who will protect you?"

"I will," Richard replied as the brunette studied his face. "I promise you that I'll return to you."

Standing, she made her way to him and held out her hand. "You'd better."

Taking her hand, he stood and followed her into the trees. This would be their last night together and he was more than eager to spend it with her. She lead him a little further than he expected, but he didn't question her. He never needed to. After a few more steps, Kahlan came to a stop and pulled his arms around her until his chest pressed against her back.

"I'm going to come back to you, Kahlan. I promise."

Turning her head into his, he nodded. "I know."

"Are you upset with me?"

Chuckling, the Confessor shook her head. "Because you made the decision without me?" she asked while moving his hands over her stomach. Even though her corset dulled the feeling, she could imagine the way his hands always felt against her skin. "No. I knew that you would; I was counting on it. Had you not, it would have haunted you."

"I meant to discuss it with you first."

Leaning her head back, she closed her eyes with a moan as she brought his hands to her breasts. "We can discuss it now."

"It wouldn't change my mind," he told he quickly. "You're going back in the morning."

"And tonight?"

"Tonight, I'm going to have my way with the Mother Confessor."

"Kahlan?"

Looking up from the swell of her belly, the brunette smiled at the sight of her friend. "She's active today."

"She must feel the rifts closing."

Looking out of the window before her, Kahlan beamed. "He did it, Cara. It's beautiful."

"It's boring."

"Come sit with us for a while."

"No."

Returning her eyes to her friend, she patted the bench beside her. "Please?"

"Fine."

"Thank you." Staring outside, she leaned to her right, resting her shoulder against that of her friend's. "May I talk to you about something?"

"If you must."

"I've been thinking about something and I think it's time to say it out loud."

"You don't want Richard to stay when he comes."

Looking over to her friend, Kahlan nodded slowly. "He can still have a life with someone else and be a part of our daughter's life."

"He won't leave you to be with another woman."

"Im not sure, Cara. He knows our daughter will be here and that she'll know who he is."

The blonde shook her head and continued to stare out of the window. "He will never go for it. He hasn't looked at another woman; it will be worse now that you're fatter."

With a soft chuckle, she nudged her friend's arm. "I'm six months pregnant, Cara."

"Fat," she replied without thought. Turning her head, she met Kahlan's blue eyes and frowned. "He won't take it well."

"I don't know what else to do. We both know that there's going to come a time when I can't control my magic and when it does, we'll lose him."

"Maybe Zedd has already changed his mind. He may not come at all."

"He'll come," Kahlan said quietly, returning her gaze to the window. "He made a promise and he will keep it, even if he has changed his mind."

"Would you prefer his mind to change?"

"I want to say yes, but it wouldn't be true. I don't want him to want anyone else, but it's the only way I can see him truly living."

"His feelings won't change."

"They could."

"And that's what scares you."

Her head jerked toward her friend, in shame. "Of course it scares me. I'm terrified that one day, I'm going to wake up and find him sitting across the room with that look on his face. He'll tell me he's been thinking and that the decision wasn't easy, but he's made up his mind." Rubbing her hands over her stomach, she blinked and looked down, almost seeing their daughter's face. "He won't want to hurt me, so he'll ease around it, telling me how he will always be there for our daughter... He'll kiss me and then walk through the door."

"Then don't let him," Cara said as though it was the most obvious of solutions. "You're stronger than he is and with the right chains, he-"

"Chains? Cara, if I wanted to force him to stay, I wouldn't need chains."

Tossing her hands up, the blonde sighed. "Confess him, then. He won't leave and you can stop whining about what may happen."

Blinking out a set of tears, Kahlan nodded. "You're right." She stood, looking out of the window one last time before walking to the door. It wouldn't be long before Richard returned to her and when he did, she needed to have a plan.


	4. Chapter 4

Richard rushed through the Aydindril gates with a smile that spread across his face. The people of the city cheered as the fully bearded man hurried by while the Wizard of the First Order struggled to keep up with his pace. The Seeker waved at them and shook their hands, their eyes never connecting longer than an instant before he looked up in search of her again. There were no guards in his line of sight, bringing him to panic for a moment before his eyes found what he had been looking for.

He drank in the sight of her for a few seconds, admiring the beauty of the very pregnant Mother Confessor. Her cheeks were flushed and she seemed out of breath, informing him that she had been in as big of a hurry as he to see him. Dropping the hand of a merchant, he soared toward her, his feet moving faster than he ever thought possible. Before either could form a single word, their lips collided in a frantic passion.

He caressed her cheeks as her body pushed against his, silently welcoming. As they parted for air, he dropped to his knees and gently brought his hands to her stomach. The people stared as he explored the mound, his lips coming to the top to rest for a long moment as Kahlan's fingers wound into his hair. With another kiss to her belly, he returned to his feet and took hold of both of her hands. "Spirits, I've missed you."

Zedd coughed softly behind him, bringing the couple to realize where they were and remember that they were surrounded by others. "We've been pushing to get here as quickly as possible, maybe we should go inside and fill our bellies."

"You're right," Kahlan replied in a voice that ringed in Richard's ear. "The kitchen is preparing a feast, you will have your fill." She turned away quickly, trying to leave the Seeker's hand behind, but his hold was too strong. Swallowing her heartbeat, she held her gaze on the road ahead of them, knowing his were on her.

"Kahlan, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she lied at once, glancing over at him. "I forgot there were people around us."

"Does that matter?"

Nodding her head, she licked her lips, tasting him once again. "Confessor's don't normally kiss men in public."

"Oh. I'm sorry." She remained silent, even as his hand tightened on hers. "You look beautiful, Kahlan."

She stopped and turned to him, tears in her eyes as her guards blocked them from the people's eyes. "Thank you."

"Kahlan, what's wrong?" He was standing so close to her, his stomach touched hers. If she didn't answer him, or give the response he wanted, he wouldn't let it go. "Kahlan, please..."

Pushing all thoughts from her mind, she forced herself to smile and touch his cheek. "It's just hard to believe you're here." Pausing for a moment, she pushed back her tears. "Come on, you must be hungry."

Following her lead, he nodded sadly. "I'm fine. I ate before we set out this morning. Kahlan, I was hoping for a few moments alone with you."

"Alright." She looked to her guards and motioned for them to go ahead of them. "Would you make sure we have a place to ourselves?"

"Yes, Mother Confessor." They didn't go far, aiding Richard's confusion and growing fear. The couple remained silent and still as the guards opened the doors to the rooms around them. He watched her carefully, trying to read her, trying to understand what she was thinking, but her face held no emotions. "This room is secure, we can wait outside if you wish."

"Thank you, Billy. It's alright, we'll be fine in here. You may go on to the feast."

Billy looked at Richard, studying him for a moment before bowing his head. "Lord Rahl. Thank you for all you have done for us. If you need anything, please do not hesitate to ask."

"Thank you." Watching the men leave, Richard tried to form words to one of the many questions in his mind. Just as he was able to open his mouth, the door closed. "Kahlan-"

Walking across the room, she lifted one of the two lit candles and began using it to light a few of the others, making it possible for him to see her fully. They were in what appeared to be a spare bedroom, though from the beauty of it, he imagined someone important sleeping in it. "He likes you."

"Who?"

"Billy," she said with a soft laugh. "He doesn't like many people. I guess he's a lot like Cara." Sitting down on the edge of the bed, she looked up and waited for him to approach. He remained still. "Are you going to stand over there all night?"

Confused, he took a hesitant step toward her. "I don't understand. Kahlan, you don't seem happy to see me."

"I'm sorry. I am- I didn't want to overwhelm you."

"What do you mean?"

Looking down, she laid her hands on her stomach. "I wasn't seven months pregnant when you last saw me."

Relief flooded his veins as he closed the distance between them. "Kahlan-"

"I-"

"No," he said calmly, kneeling down before her and taking her hands. "Kahlan, you are beautiful." Leaning up, he brushed his lips against hers with a smile. "Beautiful." Releasing her hands, his roamed her belly, moving up until he came to her breasts. His hands stilled as his mouth pulled back from hers to silently ask permission to continue. "Would it be alright if I showed you how beautiful you are?" Threading her fingers into his hair, she tried to hold back her smile. "Is that a yes?"

She nodded slowly, bringing her hands to his cheeks as his lips came back to hers.

He searched the bed for her, his hand roaming the soft; warm sheets before opening his eyes. She was sitting on the other side of the room, her back facing him as she held her hands out to the fireplace before her. She was wrapped in a blanket, her clothes still laying on the floor.

"Are you alright?"

"Fine," Kahlan replied without thought, her eyes staring at the fireplace.

Sitting up, Richard pushed off the blankets and came to his feet. The floor was cold, making him jump for a second at the first contact. "You're staring into flames, Kahlan."

"I'm trying to keep warm."

Smiling, he knelt down beside her rocking chair and slipped his hands beneath the blanket, gliding over the soft skin of her legs. "You could have stayed in bed, I'd keep you warm."

"I didn't want to risk waking you."

"I wouldn't have minded."

"You've been traveling for weeks, you should rest."

Removing his hands, he sat back on his heels. "I have no intention of resting alone. Kahlan, you don't have to draw this out. What's wrong?" Her head turned slowly and she met his eyes. "Kahlan?"

"I thought that I would have this figured out by the time you arrived."

"What?"

"How to ask you to leave me."

He froze, his heart paused in pain as she held his gaze. He was kneeling before her and suddenly realized how naked he was. "What are saying? No."

"No?" she questioned in confusion. His tone had been hard and sure, leaving no room for anything else.

"It's my child within you; I will not leave. This is what we wanted Kahlan, a family, together. How could the thought enter your mind?"

"The thought has always been in my mind, Richard. I am a Confessor, I know better and I can give you nothing more."

"I don't want anything more. Spirits, have you- All of these months, you've been trying to find a way to send me-?"

"I didn't think about it until I no longer fit into my dress."

"And then you started to think that I wouldn't find you beautiful any longer."

Looking back to the flames, she shook her head. "I wish that was the only thing I thought about. For months all I could imagine was the look on your face when you realized that I had nothing left."

"Look at me." She hesitated, continuing to stare into the burning flames until his fingers touched her chin and gently turned her head. "Kahlan, I'm not going to leave you." Inching closer, he tilted his head in a sadnesses felt through his eyes. "But I understand why and how you could feel that- this way. Our relationship may be different than everyone else's in one way, but it doesn't mean it is something less. I know you believe that it is I, who loses something, but it's not. Kahlan, it is you who- I keep expecting you to realize that I have nothing left."

"Richard-"

"I can maybe give you one more child Kahlan, but why would you want me to? You've seen what being with you is like for me, the release- You won't allow yourself to have that with me. You can't have much more from me, Kahlan and it terrifies me to think of the moment that becomes clear to you."

"How can you think that way?"

"Kahlan, do you not realize that it is the same way you've been thinking about me? We've had the same fears." Grabbing her waist, he pulled her gently to the floor before him. The blanket began to fall from her shoulders, stopped only by his hands as he worked to keep her warm. "I wish that I could give you what you have given me." He brought her into his arms, kissing her neck for a moment. "Before, when you said that you didn't want to overwhelm me- That you weren't-"

"Seven months pregnant the last time you saw me."

"You said that to judge my response, didn't you? Thinking that somehow, it would help you find the right way to push me away."

Nodding, the Mother Confessor leaned back and tugged the blanket tightly around herself. "I thought that if I could get you to see me differently, you would want to leave and I wouldn't have to-"

"We both know that no matter how it happened, if I wanted to leave you or if you succeeded and pushed me away, it would have hurt all the same."

"It already hurts, Richard."

"I know." Taking her hands, he pulled them from the blanket and watched as it fell to the floor. "Kahlan, I'm going to ask you to trust me."

"I do-"

"I want you to release your magic."

She acted quickly, pushing him back as she struggled to come to her feet. "No! How can you ask me to do that?! You know what will happen to you! You know how much I love-" Closing her mouth, she turned away and reached for the blanket.

"You won't hurt me, I promise. Kahlan, please. If we don't do this now, if we don't allow ourselves this moment, we are going to-"

"Live the life we have right now?"

"When you say it like that, it-"

"I told you the moment would come, Richard."

He stared at her for a few moments, seconds that seemed to last their lifetime. There were so many things that he wanted to say, that he needed to say, but he couldn't find the right words. When she began to shift, readying herself to leave, he took hold of her and pulled until the weight of him held her to the floor. "I know how this seems, Kahlan. I do, but listen to me. I didn't mean to imply that what we have is not enough. It is, it is everything that I have ever wanted and more, because of you. Kahlan, you are worth more to me than anything else and if what you wanted from me was to just be here with you, for the rest of our lives, if all you wanted was for me to hold you and nothing more, I would do it. I would lay with you, night after night, hugging you to me as tightly as possible."

"I would do anything for you, anything, but I'm afraid that it may not be enough. I want you to experience what you've given me. A moment of pleasure that takes all breath from your body and brings you to a place you never want to leave. I want you to have it, but not with anyone else. Confess me and I will give it to you."

Laying both of her hands on his cheeks, she smiled sadly. "That moment isn't worth your existence, no matter how much I long for it." He collapsed on top of her, his strength fading as her eyes held his. "Is it like that?"

"What?"

"That moment," she replied through a whisper with red cheeks.

Grinning, Richard nodded and shifted his body above her, trying to relieve the pressure between them. "It's better, but I can't find any other words."

"I like those."

"So do I." Rolling off of her, he settled by her side, his hand resting on her stomach. "I've been thinking about it a lot, Kahlan. Not the release I have, but what I asked you to do."

"Why?"

"So I would know what to say when you denied my request." Propping up his head, he looked down at the solemn expression on her face. "Do you want to get up? I can't imagine the floor is very comfortable for you."

His words brought a smile to her lips, it was small, but it remained. "I'm fine. It's more comfortable than you'd think."

Richard chuckled and laid down, matching her position. "I don't think so. It was more comfortable a few moments ago."

"That's because you were laying on me."

"I had a beautiful view." Turning his head, he looked over her profile, wishing her smile would never fade. "Have you thought of a name yet?"

"No. I didn't want to do it without you."

"I'm here now."

Her smile widened as she looked toward him. "What do you have in mind?"

"I promised Zedd that I would tell you his suggestion."

"He has a suggestion?"

"He does and I believe it to be one you are very familiar with."

"He wants us to name her after him?"

Richard laughed, unable to hold it in as he turned onto his side to face her. "He claims that since he named me Seeker, he is the reason we met."

"We met before you became the Seeker."

"I don't think he counts my saving your life."

"I saved your life."

"I think we remember that day differently."

Kahlan raised an eyebrow, and grinned. "And you remember it wrong."

"Do I?" he questioned with a smile. "Kahlan, had I not come along, you would have been thrown from that cliff."

"I was fine before you swooped in and tried to rescue me. I was merely waiting for the right moment to attack."

"Alright," he said softly, pouting his lips in defeat. "I didn't save you, but I did help."

"I'm not denying that," she beamed. "But Zedd had no part in our relationship."

"He did," Richard countered. "I don't think I would have ever seen you again had he not given me the Sword of Truth."

"I don't know. You may have had the urge to explore and when the boundary collapsed, you could have entered the Midlands."

"You're right. I think I would have found you again, somehow and made sure we never named our daughter Zedd."

"I'm glad we agree." She sighed in frustration as she tried to roll over and get a better look at him. "You didn't answer my previous question."

"I've been thinking of names since you told me you were pregnant."

"And the one that's been lingering in your mind?"

"How did you know I have-"

"I know you, remember?" Laying her hand on his chest, she watched her fingers push into his skin. "What name?"

"Amari." He didn't hesitate to answer her question, but the moment it left his lips, a part of him feared the result. In truth, there were three names that remained in his mind, but the one he spoke was by far his favorite.

"Say it again."

"Wh-?"

Smiling, she returned to her back and brought his hands to her belly. "She's been still all morning. Say it again."

"Amari." His smile filled his features as he felt their daughter move for the first time. "Does that mean she likes the name?"

"I believe it does." Closing her eyes, she held her hands above his. "What does it mean?"

Richard chuckled and inched closer, pressing his lips to her shoulder. "It means gift."

"It's perfect."

Lifting his head, he looked down at her smiling face and waited for her eyes to open and meet his. "Are you sure?"

"Should I disagree?"

"No."

Laughing, Kahlan pushed his hands from her stomach and struggled to sit forward. "Would you help me? I can't seem to-"

"Here," he said as his arms wrapped around her. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have held you down here for so long."

"That's not the problem. I- I haven't been able to move as well as I could before, not since I lost the ability to see my own feet." She turned toward him quickly, pushing three of her fingers to his lips to stop the laugh. "That wasn't a joke."

"M orry."

"I think Cara may go mad if I asked for her help dressing one more time."

He grinned and raised his eyebrows, fighting another urge to laugh. "We can hope."

"She's been good to me, though. At times, I think it surprised her as much as me at how protective she was."

"What do you mean?"

Wrapping the blanket around her, she shifted her body to make it easier for her to look at him. "She wouldn't let anyone near me for weeks. When I was summoned to a meeting with the council, she would stand between us, watching their every move as though she knew it would be their last." The fire popped and she jumped, making her chuckle as Richard hurried to protect her from the unseen danger. "She and Billy, together, they were unstoppable. The council gave in-"

"Gave in? The letter- whatever it was Zedd sent-"

"He didn't send anything with me." She grabbed his arms and pulled, using her entirety to keep him from moving away and rushing angrily out of the door. "You have to understand, Richard."

"He lied to me! He sent you into a trap and allowed me to believe you were safe!"

Moving slowly, she pushed herself onto her knees, using his shoulders to help ease the action before taking hold of his face. "Listen to me, it's not Zedd's fault. He knew that it wouldn't have helped me. There is a lot about me- what I am that you don't understand."

"Then help me to."

"I don't know how."

"Start with why you didn't take anything from Zedd to help you."

"The council chooses the mate of the Mother Confessor."

"Why?"

"Because they want the child she bears to have a strong bloodline."

"I thought that every Confessor had to chose a man that would give them-"

"A Confessor can chose any man she wishes." Looking to the fire, she sighed. "Will you help me up? I have a meeting with the council after lunch."

He hesitated for a moment, hoping to get another piece of information from her, but when it didn't come, he nodded. "Of course."

He helped her dress in a matter of minutes, his mind still lingering on the reply she had given him before. If a Confessor was allowed to have any man she wanted, why would there be a problem with her choosing him? He understood that there may be a small difference he was overlooking in that she was the Mother Confessor, but he couldn't understand why the council would want her with someone else. He was strong, kind, smart and if they wanted a powerful bloodline, they shouldn't look any farther than him. After all, he is a Rahl. He had begun to question her further on it more than a dozen times while she dressed, but each time his mouth opened, all words failed him as he allowed himself to imagine the worst of their conversations.

"Richard," Kahlan said as she watched him pull on his own clothes. "I know you have questions and I promise I will do my best to answer them."

Bringing his head through his shirt, he gave a small nod. "Thank you."

Darting her eyes to the floor, she brought her hands to rest on the top of her stomach. "Do you want me to arrange a tour of the city for you?"

"No," he replied with a smile. "If it's alright, I would like to come with you."

Holding out her hand, the Mother Confessor smiled. "They're going to have some questions for you."

"Not as many as I have for them."

"May we speak with the Seeker alone?"

"No-"

"It's alright, Richard. I'll be in the kitchen with Zedd until you're done."

"I have nothing to say to these people, Kahlan."

Tightening her hold on his hand, she took a step closer. "They can answer many of your questions, Richard and the ones they have for you, they need to be answered."

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like whatever is about to happen may take you away from me." Her silence made his heart soar from his chest with each beat, a fear settling within him as he closed the distance between them. Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her, hard and passionate, leaving no room for misinterpretation for the action. "I won't let them separate us, Kahlan."

"I know," she agreed quietly, her breath attempting to return to her.

He watched her leave, his eyes remaining on the large set of doors as they closed him off with the others. Their eyes burned into his skin and he was almost certain they were awaiting the perfect moment to attack. Panthers, Kahlan had once called them, stealthy predators who knew your every weakness and when they strike, you don't recover. As he turned to face them, he took a step forward to hold his ground, to show strength instead of fear, an action he immediately found to be the right one. They each sat before him at one of two tables, a large chair, the Mother Confessor's chair, sitting between them. They remained silent as he looked to each one, studying them carefully the way he assumed Kahlan would.

"You wish to discuss the child growing within the Mother Confessor," he stated clearly so that each could hear. They seemed surprised by his words, but nodded without pause. It felt strange to call her by her title, but these were not the kind of people who would like to or even try to speak her name. They feared her, a fact he saw the instant they entered the room and he intended to see just how heavy it was. "What is it you wish to say?"

The group exchanged looks in a few moments of silence. From where he was standing, it appeared they were trying to decide who would speak for them. He quickly began to understand why weapons were not allowed in the room, when someone began to speak, he felt a rage they were lucky he swallowed.

"You have taken the Mother Confessor's value and with no thought of the consequences. Things may be different in Hartland, but here, we have rules that are to be obeyed. You may not defile a woman simply because you want to. Your actions have ruined her chances of taking a better mate."

"You mean, I have ruined the chances of her taking a man you want her to."

The man who had previously spoken, one of the oldest by the look of him, slammed his fist on the top of the table. "We have lived this way since the beginning of time! You have no right to destroy all we have worked for!"

"It is YOU who has no right! How dare you tell someone how to live, who to care about and who to take to their bed. I love her." Each member of the council seemed to gasp at his admission. The idea of anyone caring for or loving a Confessor never entered their minds, but now there was a man before them with a plea to allow him to love one. "I don't expect you to understand, you can't see past your fear of her magic." Richard took another step forward, bringing each of their backs to stiffen.

"She is a Confessor; lying with her will destroy you."

"Yes," he replied with a nod. "She is a Confessor, but she will not harm me. I've already laid with her, the proof is growing within her and yet, here I stand as well as I have ever been. It's not my life you are worried about, not my existence. Let's not pretend it to be so and instead, talk about what it is you wish to. We didn't come to you before we made love and I am not sorry for that. You feel like you've lost all of your control because you don't want to admit that you never had any. I'm sorry, but each one of you knows it to be true. Confessors have chosen men, probably the ones you have wanted them to for years and it's all because they have never fallen in love. The fear you all have for them keeps you from getting to know them."

"The Mother Confessor is a dangerous creature."

"She can be, but not only because of her magic. She's a skilled fighter and I have seen her take down a dozen men without using her magic. If she wanted to bring anyone harm, she wouldn't need her magic."

"We are beginning to see that you do not know the Mother Confessor as well as you think you do. Sit down, there are some things you should know."

Richard quietly entered the kitchen and looked around, unexpectedly surprised by the size as he continued forward. His grandfather was sitting at a tall table close to the oven, Kahlan sitting before him. The older man lifted his hand and pressed his index finger to lips, telling the Seeker to be quiet as he sat down beside him. The Mother Confessor had her head propped up in her hand, her elbow holding it off of the table as she slept.

Leaning to the younger man, Zedd whispered, "She fell asleep almost an hour ago. I'm surprised she made it through the slice of pie. How did the meeting go?"

"Fine," he answered quickly and just as quietly. "She was right, they were able to answer my questions."

"You didn't like what they had to say?"

"No, but she knew that. Zedd, she knew what they would tell me and she allowed them to. They spent over an hour trying to convince me that she didn't care about me at all and then, when that didn't change my feelings for her, they went on to tell me everything she has ever done wrong." He chuckled softly and reached across the table, grabbing the fork that rested beside her plate. Pushing the metal into one of the two slices of pie his grandfather had left, he looked at the sleeping brunette. "Did you know she was four when she confessed someone for the first time?"

"No."

"I did," Richard said between his bites. "She told me once, when we couldn't sleep. The man's face still haunts her. They told me the story as though it should change everything, but it doesn't. I spent most of my time in there defending us and I kept thinking that she must have done the same thing, because the only part that seemed to surprise them was when I said that I loved her." Bringing his eyes back to his grandfather's he frowned. "Why is it so hard for everyone to believe I love her? I say the words and they look at me in pity and I can't help but feel the same way toward them. They're so afraid of her that they can't see how wonderful she is."

"Did they tell you what is to come of the child?"

"They will not take her from us, Kahlan and I have made sure of that. She's fought for us all of these months, Zedd. Our family- Our lives can continue together because of her."

Zedd pulled his plate away from his grandson, blocking the last of the pie with his arm. "Get your own." Both men looked to Kahlan, who shifted her body, but didn't awaken. "You must not tell her what you said to them."

"Zedd, I didn't-"

His eyes hardened and shifted to the young man's. "They would not have allowed her to be yours unless you gave them reason to. I know the council, Richard and I know you must have done something to have them agree to keep her to yourself. Whatever you promised them or whatever your terms are, you must not tell her."

"I didn't have to negotiate with them, Zedd. They didn't try to gain anything from me." Looking to Kahlan, he dropped his fork and reached forward, brushing some of her hair out of her face. "They said that soon I would want to leave, that everything would become clear to me once she told me what they said was true, but they don't understand, Zedd. Every story they told me, I heard from her first. She has never hid anything from me." Moving off of his chair, he walked around the table and stood at her side. "I'm going to take her back to the room."

She jumped as his hand came to her shoulder, knocking over her plate before her eyes met his. "Richard? I'm sorry, I-" Looking to the wizard, she frowned. "How long was I asleep?"

"Not long."

"I'm sorry, Zedd."

"Come with me?" Richard held out his arm, helping her to her feet. She didn't hesitate to take his help, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. "You could have warned me," he said as they exited the kitchen.

"Where would the fun be in that?"

"I don't think fun was invited to that meeting. Are they always so closed minded?"

"No, but you are the first man to step in there and defend yourself freely. I can't imagine it's easy for them to watch something change."

"Do you want to know what they said?"

"I don't know. A part of me wants to, but only because I want to know your reply." She stopped walking and turned toward him, meeting his eyes for a moment as a smile came to her lips. "Who's granddaughter did they offer you?" Confusion and shock covered his face as he tried to understand why she was smiling. "Martha's?" she questioned next with a quiet laugh. "She's a very pretty girl."

"She is," he agreed in a whisper, stepping closer to the Confessor. "They were surprised I turned her away." Taking her hand, he urged her onward. "I don't think they understand how a child is created."

"What?"

"They offered her to me as some kind of prize, saying that once I laid with her and had my release, I would see what I could have."

"I don't think that's what they were thinking about when they spoke with you."

"No, they were busy trying to convince me I couldn't love you." His hand tightened on hers as he looked over, seeing the quick set of emotions that crossed her face. "There is one question they asked that I don't understand..."

"What is it?"

"They wanted to know how we made love." He watched her carefully, hoping she had an explanation and the unsurprised look on her face told him she did. "Why would they ask me that?"

"They wanted to know if I took you the way I would my mate." Coming to another stop, she looked to him and tilted her head. "What did you tell them?"

Grinning, he pushed back a hearty laugh. "I told them we liked to be together in many ways, never settling with one."

"You didn't-"

"I did. It's none of their business how we are when we're together, Kahlan. They had no right to ask me and I don't know how I knew, but I knew that my answer could hurt you."

"I'm sorry they asked you that. You're right, they had no right."

"I wish you could have seen their faces, though."

"Me too." Moving with him, she nodded to the guards at the end of the hall, giving a quick smile before looking back to the man beside her. "You want to know how a Confessor takes a mate, don't you?"

"The thought has entered my mind, but I don't think that I do. I like the way we share our bed, the floor, the table beside the fireplace."

"Richard-"

"I don't want to know, Kahlan."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to know how you would be with someone else."

Tossing a glance in his direction, she smiled. "What makes you think it's different than-"

"Because when we're together, you allow me to... Lead."

"And you don't think I would-"

He shook his head and released her hand, bringing his arm to wrap around her waist and hold her close. "No. I know you and I know that if you took a mate, you could never be with him the way you are with me. It would kill you." She looked around them with a sigh, wondering what she should say, but as usual, he didn't leave her to her thoughts for too long. "How do you feel?"

Relief flooded her at the change of subject, almost bringing a smile to her face. "Good. Tired," she added with a soft laugh.

"Do you want to rest?"

"I don't think you've been leading me back to our room for sleep."

"Another thought may be in my mind, but we don't- I understand if you want to sleep."

Kahlan licked her lips and turned her head with a grin. "There's more than enough time to sleep, Richard."


	5. Chapter 5

"You're staring at me."

"How can you be sure?" Richard questioned through a quiet whisper, his breath coming quickly as he continued searching for air. "Your eyes are closed."

"I can feel yours on me." Turning her head to the right, she opened her eyes and instantly met his. "What's wrong?"

"Before, when we were walking down the hall, you said something-" He stopped as a smile quickly came to her lips, fighting the urge to question her.

"Our room?" She asked softly. "You had the same look on your face when I said it before."

"Why did you say it?"

"W- Should I not have?"

"No, I- Kahlan, you said it like you knew I was staying."

She sighed in realization, understanding him perfectly as his eyes held hers. He had just come from a meeting with the council, been offered another woman and she hadn't blinked when she spoke the word. "I know you're staying."

"You don't think I'm waiting for you to go to sleep so I can slip out and meet another woman?"

Kahlan laughed, surprising him. "No, I don't. If you were going to meet another woman, you would have let me sleep in the kitchen."

"Kahlan-"

"If you wanted to be with another woman, you wouldn't sneak away when I was asleep. Richard, I- I said our room because, to me, that's what it is. I'm sorry, I should have mentioned it to you first."

Propping himself onto the bed, he smiled down at her as his fingers found her hair. "Where would the fun have been with that? You didn't do anything wrong, Kahlan, I was just- I wasn't sure how this would be for us."

"Neither was I, but I thought it would be easier to share a room until we couldn't bare to look at each other any longer."

"I don't think that moment will arrive. I find it difficult to look away from you."

She pushed the blanket down and brought her hands to her stomach, knowing his eyes would follow. "Even like this?"

Richard smiled, easing her thumping heart just enough to allow her to hear his words. "I meant what I said before. You're beautiful," he told her as he sat up and held her pregnant belly in both of his hands. "Our daughter is in here, she's growing within you, can't you see how beautiful that is? You're holding another life, right here and I wish I could find the words that could prove it to be true. Kahlan, look at me, really look at me. I can think of nothing more attractive than you are to me." Smiling, he pulled back his hands and brought their blankets back over her slightly shivering body. "I understand that you must be uncomfortable, but you're still the most beautiful woman in existence."

"I- It doesn't feel that way every moment."

"How does it feel? Still full?"

Her smile spread across her face as she nodded her head. "Would you be upset if I said it was?"

"No."

"It feels like- I don't know how to explain."

"How does she make you feel?"

She stared up at him for a few moments, letting the silence dance around them as she found his hand and took it into hers beneath the blankets. "Happy." He jumped at the knock on their bedroom door, but she held him still with a soft laugh. "It's Cara. She's going to make sure we're alright before she leaves with Billy for their hunting trip. You can come in, Cara."

The door opened and the blonde walked in with a single glance in the couple's direction as she carried a tray to the table beside the fire at the far side of the room. "We'll be back before lunch tomorrow."

Lifting herself onto her elbows, Kahlan grinned. "Take your time. It's been a few days since you've been able to spend some time together."

"We do not spend time together," Cara insisted as Richard fell back onto the bed with a laugh.

"You and Billy have been-"

"Hunting. We go hunting."

"You don't have to hide it, Cara. I've seen the two of you together. Last week, the bedroom on the right side of the gates..." Motioning to the door with her head, the Mother Confessor tried to hide her still wide smile. "Go, we'll be fine for a few days. Take him to the cabin by the river and you'll be alone until Richard remembers he hates being cooped up."

The Mord'Sith mumbled something as she exited the room, words the couple knew to be in unwanted gratitude.

"You're welcome!" Richard called after her as the door clicked shut. "When did she and -"

"Two months after we arrived. I asked her to go with him as he circled the palace. He hasn't taken his eyes off of her."

"It must drive her mad."

"It did, but after a few days of being stuck to his side... They began to disappear for a while every other day."

"At least she's happy. I think."

Laughing, Kahlan laid back and rolled her shoulders in search of comfort. "I think she may be, though we both know that she would never tell us." Turning her head, she smiled at the man laying beside her without a care. "But she's been smiling, not one like you or I would, but... It's nice to see."

Richard turned onto his side and met her smile. "She brought food."

Richard held her to his chest as they slept. He jumped at the light knock on the door, but quickly dismissed it, not wanting to wake the woman in his arms. It had taken her a few hours to fall asleep and he would give anything to keep from disturbing her. The door opened and the Seeker felt his blood run cold as he looked to the figures who entered. One of the council members entered without care, her granddaughter walking gracefully behind her.

Anger boiled within him as he noticed the young woman's clothes, the white dress of the Mother Confessor. Her dark hair framed her face beautifully, but she held no strength. She looked down at him with a half smile, appearing to be confused, but remained silent. The dress barely hung onto her shoulders, the fabric threatening to fall to the floor at the wrong move. The girl before him had no resemblance to the woman in his arms, her breasts too small, matching her nearly nonexistent frame. His mind rushed through responses between tackling the woman the the ground and removing her head, but with Kahlan in his arms, he couldn't do either. Instead, he remained still and stared at them as they came to the side of the bed.

"How dare you enter our room without invitation. Leave now!" Neither women moved and his anger grew. "You will leave and you will have the dress returned in the morning. You have no right to wear it."

The women looked down at the brunette who didn't flinch as he spoke. "How can you want this woman to bare your children, she cannot awaken when there is danger-"

"She doesn't need to," Richard replied with a grin. "I'm here and she knows I will protect them both. There is no reason for her to stir." Tightening his arms around her, he glared at the two women. "Please leave. I will not be as polite if I must ask you again." The younger woman leaned forward, bringing her knee to rest on the side of the bed. Her face came closer and closer to the Seeker, announcing her intentions without pause. "Kahlan, wake up."

The young woman froze as the eyes of the Mother Confessor opened to his words. She swallowed and waited in fear as their gazes met. The room went silent as Kahlan lifted her head and looked from one woman to the other and gave the response no one expected. Bringing her eyes to Richard, she gave a small smile and raised an eyebrow. "Do you two need a moment alone? I could roll over and hold onto the pillow."

He laughed, though he tried not to. "I don't think you could roll over without help."

"I can roll," she said with a quick grin. "It's sitting up I need help with."

"This is ridiculous!" Martha shouted as she threw her hands into the air. "The two of you have gone mad!"

Kahlan rolled onto her back and closed her eyes, searching for the strength to keep herself calm. "Martha, I understand you're upset, but if you do not leave our bedroom, l will make sure the next person your granddaughter is offered to will not be as kind as Richard."

"Mother Confessor!"

"Get out!" The two women hurried from the room, apologizing in words she didn't bother to listen to as she tried to forget her anger. After a few moments, she licked her lips and let out a breath. "I'm sorry."

"I wouldn't have-"

"I know," she said quickly.

Richard turned onto his side and slid his right hand onto her stomach. "You may know, but it doesn't mean I can't ease your mind by saying it. I'm sorry she was wearing your dress."

"Someone should."

"Kahlan-"

"I'm sorry, I think it bothered me more than it should have."

Richard smiled sadly and inched closer to her warmth. "It should have, Kahlan. She was wearing your dress; she was-"

She turned her head toward him and swallowed the lump in her throat, wishing she hadn't awoken. "That's not what bothers me, Richard."

He was confused for a moment, but as he looked at her, he began to understand the expression on her face. "I would never want her over you- I would not want anyone but you, not even if they were poorly dressed in your clothes. I can't imagine how it must have felt to wake up with her leaning over us, but you have to know that I wasn't interested in her."

Her hands came to her stomach and laid over his, keeping it still as she nodded. "I know, but I- How can you love me when everyone says it's impossible?"

Smiling widely, he tried to get closer. "Everything we have ever done was impossible. Defeating the Keeper, creating the child within you... I think the spirits are on our side and everybody else, they're still catching up."

"I don't know how you do that."

"What?"

"You always know how to make me feel better."

His smile widened before he pressed his lips to her shoulder. "Impossible things, Kahlan. I can do them all."

Her laugh echoed around the room, settling around them with a light haze of joy that held them close. "All of them?"

"Does the Mother Confessor doubt me?"

"I would never doubt you, Richard." Releasing his hand, she moved hers to his face and into his hair. "But I may require a small amount of proof."

"Anything."

"You shouldn't agree before I tell you what it is."

"I trust you." He chuckled as her face hardened. "Kahlan, you don't have to have confessed me to have me do anything for you. I know how that makes you feel and I'm sorry, but it's the only way I can think of to explain. I know you and I know that whatever it was you asked me to do, it wouldn't hurt anyone unless it was necessary and there was no way around it. You're not cruel for sport or thirsty for more power. There is no reason I shouldn't agree before knowing what it is you wish me to do."

"What if I asked you to allow me to confess you?"

Pushing his face close to hers, he kissed her lips quickly before answering, knowing that every possible answer would hurt her. "I am yours, Mistress."

"How can you do that? How can you look at me like that after I've asked you to allow me to destroy you?"

"There is no other way for me to look at you. I've asked you to confess me, I've spent many nights, more than you'd like, thinking about it. If you knew I was yours, would it take away your worries, make you feel safe and since you knew that I loved you before, would it make it easier for you? And the. I started to think about more than what I've seen and focus on us as a whole. Your magic is love and I love you. Your magic takes everything and turns it into love for you, my entire being is in love with you, what could it do? It's been months since I've come to a conclusion about it all."

"What conclusion?"

"Your magic can't take part of me because it's already yours." Darting his eyes to her lips, he licked his own and smiled. "I know how you feel about it and I know that you would rather chew off your own arm than confess me, but if the moment comes and we're making love or we're laying here and you let it go, I'll gladly be yours." Tracing his fingers over and down her stomach, he watched her eyes close in anticipation of the action he didn't give her. Her eyes opened as his hand moved back up to her stomach and dropped to her side. "I don't crave more than we have, but I can't help but feel that you are losing a part of yourself when you're with me. You shouldn't have to hold it back, not with me."

"You're unusual," she whispered breathlessly, unable to find any other words that wouldn't make her cry. "Thank you."

"For what?"

With damp eyes, she pulled his face closer to hers and shared his breath. "Everything."

She connected their lips before he could respond, taking full advantage of the moment. He wasted no time hovering above her, giving her body his full attention as he devoured her mouth with his. She was on the edge within minutes, her body more sensitive than before and it thrilled him. Every time he touched her set her off, bringing her higher and higher to the place he longed to take her. Her magic was on the surface, he could feel it on her skin, a soft shock that beckoned him to come closer and set it free. With a certain touch, she would be gone, her body taken away in ecstasy and she would be free, but he was terrified of what it would do to her.

Tearing himself from her body, Richard rolled them to their sides and fought to find his breath. Her vision was blurred as she opened her eyes, confused as to why he had stopped before his own release. She reached between them in search of him, only to he stopped by his own hand. He was close himself and a single touch from her would send him off, but he couldn't let go. Words failed him as he shook his head, intertwining their fingers to keep her hand busy.

He kissed her lazily, taking his time with each as he brought himself closer. Shifting their bodies, he leaned over her partly, pushing his chest against hers in just the way she liked.

"Richard," she whispered between his kisses, his body pressed against hers. "Why... Didn't... You..."

"It didn't feel right. I couldn't do it without you." Giving her lips another kiss, he smiled. "You should sleep, I have plans for us tomorrow."

They were separated for most of the days during the next month. Both tending to their duties as they were required until the darkness of the night wrapped around them. He found her asleep many nights in the rocking chair he had made her. She was wrapped in the blanket Zedd had created, a surprise that neither expected. The older man had spelled the green fabric, making it grow warmer to her needs and constantly send a sweet smell of trees through the air.

It had become a welcome comfort to her when Richard was away, finding it to be an accurate reminder of his embrace. If she didn't know how the wizard felt about them, she would believe he had done it on purpose, to help her. When the Seeker carried her to their bed, she replaced the blanket with him when he crawled into bed, instantly finding herself in his arms before his eyes fell closed. The action was the ending of the day and the thought that echoed in his mind at all times.

Every morning, he awoke before her and waited. He listened to her breathing, searching for any sound of distress or discomfort. He wondered when their daughter would arrive and steal his heart, a part of him always hoping for it to happen. She would shift in his arms before opening her eyes, her left hand moving over his bare chest as her head lifted from his shoulder.

"Today?" he asked, just as he had done ever morning before for two weeks.

"We'll have to wait and see." Kissing her, he pulled her close and rolled them over. "Richard... You have a meeting-"

"No I don't," he interrupted with a grin. "I told the council I indented to spend the week with you."

"How long did you have to fight them for-"

"Not long, once I started to remove their fingers, they all agreed we needed time together."

His words brought a matching smile to her face as she graced her hands around his shoulders. "Then I suppose we shouldn't waste another moment."

"You're right," he whispered, teasing her lips with his. "I find you something for breakfast."

A soft groan of disappointment rumbled through her as he lifted his body from hers, exposing it to the cool air of the room. "Tease."

Coming to his feet, he looked over his shoulder and grinned. "Don't worry, I plan to fully satisfy your every need."

"You're too far away for that."

"I won't be for long."

Grinning, she shifted her shoulders and lifted her back, knowing his attention would fall to her breasts. "You're right," she whispered in the soft and warm voice that she only used when they were entangled in their sheets. "We have time, I can wait." She watched his body tighten in need, responding instantly as she stretched her arms above her head. "What are we eating?"

"Spirits, Kahlan... I-"

"Honey rolls," she added quietly, closing her eyes for a moment. "Jasmine tea..." Struggling to sit up, she pulled the covers over her and sighed. "Now I am hungry."

"I have a surprise for you first," he told her as he began pulling on his pants.

Excitement flooded through her at the smile on his face. "What is it?"

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise." He walked quickly to the bedroom door and stepped outside, poking his head back in for a moment to meet her eyes. "Don't move."

She waited a few minutes, fidgeting her hands as she wondered what he would return with. He was unlike everyone she had ever known, leaving her mind blank for ideas. When she gave in and came to her own feet, the door opened and Richard came through with a small box. She met him after a few feet and eagerly waited as he opened the gift.

"I would like you to meet Jax," he told her with a smile as a small, orange kitten popped its head out of the box. Taking the small animal into her arms, she brought him to her chest and cuddled him gently while searching for words. "I found him yesterday and he reminded me of the one you once talked about. He even has the white above the nose."

"I can't believe you remember that."

"I'm full of surprises."

Rubbing her chin and cheeks over Jax's head, she smiled up at the man. "Thank you, Richard." The kitten's purrs rang loudly around them, stealing the Mother Confessor's attention with each bat of his paw to her hair.

"I was going to give him to you last night, but you were already asleep. Cara kept an eye on him."

Kahlan chuckled at the thought, shaking her head as she brought the small creature to their bed and sat him on top of the blankets. "I'm sorry, I meant to stay awake..." Her words trailed off as she wiggled her fingers on the bed, watching as the orange kitten pounced on them. "I always wanted a pet."

"Now you have one and Amari will have something to play with until we provide her with a sister."

Kahlan's hand froze as she looked up at him. He was standing no more than a foot away from her and he was smiling. From the look in his eyes, she knew his thoughts matched hers and she fought the urge to leap forward and claim him. Jax moved slowly, brushing himself against her side in an attempt to regain her attention.

"You're audience awaits," he teased, kneeling down before them. Their kitten laid down as their hands took turns petting his head, stretching out as far as he could while still remaining on the bed. "When you're bigger, we are not going to share this bed with you."

"I don't think he understands you."

"I think he does, cats are smart. Look at that face, he's plotting against me right now..."

Laughing, shook her head and danced three fingers over Jax's back. "I think you could win the fight."

"Could? Kahlan, I would definitely win a fight against him."

"Underestimating an opponents is always a mistake."

"I don't think I'm underestimating him. I'm trusting you to protect me."

"From this sweet guy?" she questioned as she lifted the animal and brought him back to her chest. "I don't think he'll hurt you." Kissing the top of his head, she moved to hold out the kitten.

Jax crawled up Richard's arm and came to sit on his shoulder, rubbing his head against the Seeker's. "You won't be able to do that when you're bigger either."

"Because Amari will be there."

He beamed at the woman sitting before him. "I can't wait."

"Me either." The smile on her face grew as she watched their cat move his paws to Richard's hair.

"Ouch! Jax! That's not a toy." His hands found her hips as she stood and reached up, taking the small animal from his head. Smoothly, he pulled at the blanket that covered her and watched as it fell to the floor. "He should explore the room, I require your full attention."

Placing Jax on the floor, she stepped closer and brushed her breasts against his chest and raised a teasing eyebrow. "I thought you wanted breakfast."

"I don't want anything else."

Grinning, she took a step back and watched him lean forward, trying to keep their contact. The back of her legs were pushed against the bed as he moved closer, the bump of her belly held against his stomach as though he needed it to breathe. As uncomfortable as she was at times, he always managed to remove all thoughts in her mind that she was anything other than the most beautiful woman in the world. He was attentive to her every need, knowing what to do in just the right moment to make her forget her own body had changed.

As he lowered her to the bed, he touched his lips to hers, a light graze that had her instantly desperate for more. Their kisses always started this way, a gentle tease that grew into a wild frenzy of passion that surrounded them in fire. His hands did magnificent wonders, a light touch here and a slow caress there that had her gasping for her next breath. He laid above her without fear, tending to her needs and desires before hinting at his own and then she felt it. It was a feeling she couldn't explain, one that occurred each time they were together, but today, this was the strongest it had ever been. Her skin tingled with her magic, but she didn't feel overwhelmed with the strength of it, the need to hold it back.

The feeling seemed to be impossible, her magic appearing to be leaking slowly from her body and into the man above. With each kiss it felt to be drawn out, lighter on her as he went back for more and suddenly, she saw it.

His eyes were as dark as hers, filling with her magic as he rocked forward, bumping his nose against hers. "How are you doing that?" she managed to pant as he started to kiss her once more. She knew she should be terrified and stop him, protecting him at all cost, but the look in his eyes, the innocent gaze that held hers took the fear away. "Why would you... Spirits..." His body moved forward again, harder than before, but met with the same intense desire.

"Let it go," he murmured. "You feel it too, it won't hurt us."

Us. The word lingered in her mind, wrapped in an effort to understand its use. If she let go, her magic would tear through him and- No. Her magic was already seeping through his veins, called forth by the man she loved and he wanted more. He needed more. There was more than desperation in his eyes, a look she couldn't quite place and hated for failing to see. He was close, hanging on for dear life as he waited, for her.

He knew what would happen and yet, here he was, easing the burden between them and caressing her fear. He was sure and she had no doubt that he had thought this through. He knew something that no one else did and all she had to do was follow his lead.

"Trust me," he growled quietly, locking their eyes for a brief moment, only to close in order for him to concentrate. "Be with me."

His words were faint in her ears as her body responded without thought, falling rapidly while their lips collided. Her body burned with power, a rage flow that seemed desperate to come out and for the first time, she allowed it to go free.

It was unlike everything she had ever experienced, putting all other pleasures to shame. She had heard other women speak of this moment, other Confessors who had shared their experience, but Kahlan knew it had never been anything like this. Spots danced before her eyes, even as they fell closed and for a few moments, she could swear she could see his thoughts. It was impossible to describe, the connection between them being so strong it felt they shared the same body.

Richard lifted his head from the crook of her neck with a wide smile, one that covered his face as he moved to kiss her once more. She held him close as her body continued to quiver in a pleasant exhaustion, unwilling to let him go even as the door to their room flew open. The couple turned their heads toward the noise, but neither made an attempt to move away from the other. Cara stood a few feet away, her eyes searching them for a moment before settling on Kahlan's.

"I told you." Bringing her eyes to Richard, she studied him for a second. "Still you?"

"No."

Grinning, the blonde nodded and turned on her heels. "Good."

When their bedroom door closed, Richard brought his eyes back to hers and raised an eyebrow. "What did she tell you?"

Stretching her neck, she touched her lips to his and smiled. "I can't remember." Threading her fingers through his hair, she pushed up against him, seeking more of him all over again.

"How did you know?"

He smiled widely, shaking his head slowly. "That's not the question you want me to answer." Caressing his cheeks in her hands, she felt herself wanting to cry. He was right, of course, but it was the first one she managed to ask. "You want to know how I could do it, pull your magic into me."

"How?"

"I don't know, but since the first night we were together, I have felt like your magic had already become part of me. I can feel it, all of the time, Kahlan. But," he added in a soft whisper. "I never imagined anything could feel like that. When you let go, I could have sworn you- You let me in."

They stared at each other for a few moments in silence, both waiting for the other to speak again, but suddenly, together, they let out a deep breath. They were exhausted, neither knowing how they had managed to speak while their hearts pounded against their chests and their bodies ached to the point of unmoving. When he realized the weight of him laid on her, he rolled them quickly to their sides to relieve her. She acted instantly lifting her left leg and wrapping it over his to keep him close. A soft moan of discontent left her lips as he slipped from her warmth, her body instantly attempting to regain his presence.

"I'm sorry, I need a few minutes or I won't be any use to you."

She chuckled, though she tried not to. "I wish we did this months ago."

"You do?"

Her cheeks burned hot for a moment as she nodded. "I wouldn't have let you roll off of me so quickly. You wouldn't have needed to."

"I'd crush you," he countered, bringing one of his hands to her cheek. "But I think I'd try- Ouch! Jax, we're-"

Kahlan laughed as the small orange kitten crawled over the Seeker's back and squeezed between them, rubbing himself against each before laying down with a series of loud purrs.

"Hello there. I'm starting to think you are going to have the timing of a wizard."

"We should probably keep him away from Zedd, then. We wouldn't want him to- What's wrong?"

"Zedd," Kahlan whispered almost in a panic. "He didn't come when my magic was released. Why didn't he come?"

"Maybe he did and Cara met him on the other side of the door." She said nothing as he stared at her, reading her carefully. "You're right, it wouldn't have stopped him from seeing for himself. Do you think he's left? He doesn't always stay-"

"I don't know."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I... I think she's getting ready." He jumped up, almost hurrying off of the bed, but was stopped instantly by her hand. "It's not instant. We may have hours..."

"Hours?" he questioned as she squeezed her eyes shut. "What... Can I do anything?"

Sliding her hand up his arm, she pulled him to her and hissed softly. "Can you lay here with me?"

"Of course."


	6. Chapter 6

Her magic flowed trough him four more times and Amari had yet to arrive. Kahlan's hold on the Seeker's hand had turned his skin white, numbing it almost completely as she squeezed with each breath. She tried to hold back her cries, knowing that they flowed almost directly into his ear, but he never moved. At times, when the pain overwhelmed her, he would push himself against her and whisper in her ear. The first time he had done so, almost made her laugh as he told her to imagine their wizard walking around in her dress, but the affliction wouldn't allow her to do anything other than grit her teeth.

He now sat behind her, her back leaning against his chest while one hand held his and his other arm wrapped around her waist. His mouth was close to her ear, making it possible for her to ear every word of encouragement he spoke. When he could no longer find the right words, he asked her to think of their time together; feel those moments in this one. Her cry of pain echoed in his ears, drowning out the midwife's words of explanation. He could see her face, more panicked than she had been before and he knew something was going wrong. Shaking his head, he tried to hear the woman speak, but her words fell upon deaf ears.

Kahlan seemed to have heard, her head nodding quickly as the other woman reached once again for the child. The Mother Confessor's body jerked in his arms as she screamed, the sound pulling him back as her other hand found his. She tried to hold still, her back spasming against his chest until after a few minutes, it went limp. Amari's cry filled the room, but the woman in Richard's arms didn't move. Turning her head, he hoped to meet her eyes, but they were closed and panic flooded within him.

"Kahlan? Kahlan!"

"She may not have survived," the other woman spoke calmly, wrapping the baby in a blanket.

Anger flooded the Seeker's veins at the thought, the calmness of the woman's voice. "What?!"

"Shh," she whispered, rocking the child in her arms. "You do not want this to remain with the child. Happy thoughts now."

Tears fell down his cheeks as he touched Kahlan's. She was still warm, even as his lips found hers. "I know you're tired, but you have to wake up. We need you and you know I can't be half the parent you are. You have to open your eyes Kahlan, there will be plenty of time for sleep, I promise. Open your eyes and hold our daughter." She remained still, but he continued brushing his fingers through her hair, massaging her head gently as he begged her to open her eyes. Her breathing was faint, almost impossible to detect, but his face was so close to hers, he could feel the slight warmth. "Kahlan, please... I know you're in pain, but I'm right here, let me help you. Stay with me." A soft mumble escaped her mouth, catching his attention at once, bringing him to pull back and stare at her face. "What?"

Using every ounce of strength she had, she pushed herself into speaking as clearly as possible. "Zedd would look silly in my dress."

With a laugh of relief, Richard pushed his cheek against hers and brought her into a hug. She was still struggling to breathe, but her eyes instantly went in search of their daughter. Amari cried softly in the arms of the midwife, knowing her was close. The moment the Mother Confessor held her in her arms, the world stopped around them. She was the most beautiful baby she had ever seen.

She had a fair amount of hair on her head, thick like her mother's, but light like her fathers. She had rounded cheeks that, Kahlan would swear plump because she wore a smile, a light blush gracing the skin as she took hold of part of her father's pinky. She was born early, making her smaller than most, but from the way she wiggled closer to her mom's chest told them she was strong. Her eyes, for the few brief moments they were open appeared to be blue, but even as Richard commented they were like hers, she knew that they could change.

The Seeker found himself beaming, a light glow surrounding the family as they ignored all others in the room. He wanted to do so many things, hold her in his arms and rush into the city telling them all of their child.

"She has your nose," Kahlan said in a voice just above a whisper.

"That's unfortunate," he replied through a soft laugh.

Grinning, she looked at him. "I like your nose."

"I like yours." His smile widened impossibly more as he studied her face. "Our next one, she'll have your nose."

"We'll see."

Richard helped her back to their bedroom, allowing her to lean against him as they walked down the hall. Amari had fallen asleep in her mother's arms hours before and despite his attempts to get her to rest, the only way Kahlan would sleep was if she knew their daughter was safe between them. She was exhausted, though she wouldn't admit it and when she looked down at the small baby sleeping in her arms, she felt like she never needed to sleep. The sight amazed her to the point of staring, part of her still not sure that the child wasn't imagined.

"It feels strange," she commented just as they reached their room.

"What?"

"Holding her. I know that I- I carried her, felt her within me and now as I hold her to my chest, I can't believe she exists." Continuing to look upon her, the Mother Confessor beamed. "She's so beautiful."

"She came from you," he told her quietly, leading her inside. "She could only be beautiful."

Her actions surprised him as he closed them within the walls of their bedroom. Without hesitation, she moved quickly, he imagined because she only had a little strength left, and crawled onto the bed. Her eyes fell closed for a moment as she whispered a prayer to the spirits. He was laying beside them within moments, grinning as he pulled a blanket over them. Amari shifted between them, both froze and waited for a cry, but only a soft whimper left her lips before she fell back to sleep.

"I've imagined this moment so many times."

Meeting his eyes, Kahlan smiled. "Does it compare?"

"Nothing I've ever imagined has ever come close to compare with you." He grinned, reaching over to take hold of her hand. "When I imagined this moment, I couldn't- I never thought anyone could be this happy." His smile widened as he squeezed her hand. "I keep thinking that I'm the happiest I'll ever be, but then you prove me wrong."

"I don't think I'm responsible, she is."

"She's a part of you."

"By that, you make yourself happier."

Chuckling, he nodded. "Not as much as you."

"I can't wait for tomorrow."

Smiling, Richard released her hand and pulled the blankets over her shoulder. "For tomorrow to come, you'd have to sleep."

"I don't think that I can."

"Overwhelmed with joy?"

Shaking her head she chuckled quietly. "No, Jax is playing with my feet." Lifting her head, she patted the bed just below their daughter and clicked her tongue to the roof of her mouth. "Come meet Amari."

Jax walked between the couple, watching the small baby hesitantly as he came closer. "Our family has grown by two today," Richard said as the kitten laid down between them. When he brought his eyes back to her face, he grinned at the sight. She was asleep, a smile on her lips as her body relaxed for the first time in hours.

A soft cry stirred him from his sleep, bringing him to open his eyes just in time to see Kahlan sit up as she began lifting their daughter into her arms to bring her to her chest. The sun was barely rising, a small amount of light coming through the windows and gracing them on the bed. Jax moved as the Seeker sat up, coming to sit in his lap for some attention, knowing he would get none from the other. Amari grew quiet as she began to feed, her eyes closing as she felt her mothers slow and steady heart beat.

"We didn't mean to wake you," she said as his head tilted for a better look.

"I don't mind. I'm enjoying the view." Running his eyes over her he lost his breath. Her nightgown hung off of her shoulder, revealing not only the breast that fed their daughter, but most of her other one as well. He continued watching for a moment, sorting through all of the questions he longed to ask her. "Kahlan, what happens now?"

"What do you mean?"

Swallowing, he brought his eyes to hers and smiled. "Marry me." Amari's eyes opened as her mother's heart began to pound against her chest, instantly drawing her attention. "I know- This isn't how I intended to ask, but I can't imagine going another moment without having done so." She remained silent, her mouth opened in shock. "I..." Darting his eyes to their bed, he brushed his fingers through his hair and sighed. "If you don't want to marry me, I'll understand."

"No," she managed to whisper, capturing his saddened features. "I just- I never imagined hearing anyone say that." She licked her lips as her eyes fell to his, trying to make her mouth answer his question. "Yes."

She watched relief flood through him, fading behind a wave of joy that brought a smile to stretch across his face. "Yes?"

"Yes."

Before she could take another breath, he was close enough to steal hers, connecting their lips as he took her face in his hands. She returned his kiss in full, holding back a low moan as he tried to snake a hand between them. Breaking their kiss, he looked down to make sure he hadn't disturbed their daughter, who continued to eat as though nothing had happened.

Bringing his eyes to hers, he smiled. "How are you feeling?"

She laughed for a moment, the sound filling the air. "Considering the events of yesterday, I'm feeling very well."

"Do you want- Need me to get Zedd and ask for something to help with the pain?"

Shaking her head, the new mother looked to their daughter. "No, but he did say he would come by to see us this morning. I'd imagine it would be after he's finished off all of the food in the kitchen."

"I wonder if Amari will have that kind of appetite."

"I wouldn't be surprised if she's more like him than she is us."

Richard raised an eyebrow and curled up half his lips. "I sense a joke, but I'm afraid to give the wrong response."

"I'm sorry, it wasn't funny."

"It was," he countered softly. "If you had taken another man, I don't think Zedd would have been on your list of candidates."

"Because he's tall?"

"No, because his nose- You wouldn't want to risk that passing on."

The couple laughed for a few minutes before they heard a knock at the door. The Seeker moved quickly, covering her the best he could, while making sure they could both see their daughter. Cara, they assumed was behind the door, slowly knocking in annoyance as she waited.

When Richard nodded, Kahlan looked to the door and beamed. "You can come in Cara."

"You should have locked the door, making sure that no one could enter the room."

"If we locked the door, you'd still be standing outside."

"It's not safe," the blonde replied quietly, her eyes falling upon the baby in her friend's arms. "It looks funny."

"She's beautiful," Richard said before Kahlan had a chance to take a stab at the Mord'Sith.

"The old woman wants to see the child."

The Mother Confessor chuckled for a moment at her friends words. "I'm sure she does."

Stepping closer to the bed, the blonde raised an eyebrow. "The door is sticky to her office, she could be trapped in there for hours."

"Thank you, but if she doesn't see her before the council meeting after lunch, we will be required to bring her in."

"I'll get her," Cara said as she hurried from the room.

Once they were alone again, Kahlan turned toward him. "Will you hold her while I get dressed?"

Taking their child into his arms, he watched her move to the edge of the bed. "You shouldn't move yet, Kahlan. We- You should rest, give your body a chance to heal."

"I don't have that luxury. Things are expected of us and we must-" Taking a deep breath, she pushed herself to her feet and paused. "She must be presented to the High Council and then to the city, they will hold a four day celebration and then she will be given her first Confessor's dress. It is a great honor."

"What about you?"

"I will stand at your side," she replied quietly just as she took a few weak and unstable steps.

Shaking his head, the Seeker frowned. "That's not what I meant."

Pulling her nightgown over her head, she spoke with a single breath. "I'll be fine. I think it will be easier for me once I start moving. I-" Taking a deep breath, she took the edge of the bed table and tried to stable herself. "I've known Confessors who had given birth in battle and then continued to fight... I don't know where they found the strength."

Coming to his feet, he moved to her side and smiled widely. "Here, take her." She took their daughter into her arms at once, her back straightening instantly. "Mothers are always able to protect their children. You're stronger than you realize."

"I still have to get dressed."

"I'll help you."

Zedd stood a few feet from the couple, rocking his great granddaughter in his arms while making soft noises to keep Amari entertained. Kahlan watched with a smile, a part of her still finding it difficult to believe that the child of a Confessor had a family that would be there for her. She mentioned it to Richard once, before she had given birth, telling him how happy it made her to think that their daughter wouldn't have to go through the childhood she had. The only thing she needed to do now was set things right with the wizard. He was upset with her, a fact well known to them all, but she hadn't been willing to say he had be right when she knew he wasn't. She had a life with Richard, the very thing he told her she couldn't, the life he was determined to keep from her and no matter how hard she tried, she thought it impossible to be angry with him.

She was dangerous and he was only looking out for his grandson, protecting what was left of his family and she had betrayed his trust. The moment she allowed herself to care about the Seeker, she abused the trust Zedd had in her. Closing the small distance between them, she lowered her voice to keep her words between them.

"I never meant to hurt you."

"I know," he replied instantly, his eyes remaining on the baby. "You did what you could to try to keep apart from him."

"I am not sorry," she informed him through a whisper. "Zedd, had I not fallen in love with him, I wouldn't have Amari and I wouldn't- He's my family, you are all my family."

Looking up, the wizard gave her a small smile as he nodded. "We wouldn't have it any other way."

"Did you know?" she questioned after a moment. "Did you know there was a chance my magic wouldn't hurt him?"

"Everything has a chance, dear one. I have come to believe that there is no end to the possibilities with the two of you. I had heard of it happening once before, though. Many generations ago, around the time of the first Confessor, but... I could not put the thought into your heads and watch you destroy him."

"I know."

"Zedd," Richard said with a grin, wrapping his arm around her waist. "Have you heard the great news?"

"News?"

"Kahlan has agreed to marry me!" he exclaimed joyfully.

The wizard looked from one to the other, his smile growing wider with each second. "It took you long enough!"

"It took him just long enough," she told them as she leaned into his embrace. Her body ached with each breath and though she tried not to show it, she knew that he could see.

As though reading her mind, he leaned in and brought his mouth to her ear. "Do you want to sit down? We can go to the dining hall..."

"I'm starving."

"We're eating?" Zedd asked hopefully, lifting his eyes from Amari, who had just settled into sleep.

"Amari?" Martha asked skeptically. "The name must hold meaning to the Seeker," she told the rest of the council members who sat beside her. A few of them smiled at the couple, excitedly watching the Mother Confessor rock her daughter in her arms. The rest shared the face of the council head, frowning as though they were witnessing a trial for murder. "The child must be examined before the announcement is given to the people, if she holds the magic of a Rahl-"

"No."

"Excuse me?"

Kahlan took a step forward and watched their backs stiffen. "As Mother Confessor I have the authority to overrule your decision. Our daughter will not be examined and when the day comes and we see the Rahl magic, it will not be taken away from her until she becomes of age where the decision can be placed in her own hands. We will not allow you to destroy a part of our child and we will stand by this ruling." The members of the council froze in shock, none wishing to speak in contradiction of the Mother Confessor and her child for fear of not only her rage, but that of the Seeker. Richard had taken a step forward as well, adding to the word of the woman beside him. "I will say this once and let it be clear and known. Our daughter will be raised as we see fit and your ways will not always apply."

"Mother Confessor, you cannot simply change the way things have been done for generations. They are done this way for a reason."

"I am the Mother Confessor," she hissed, looking them each in the eye. "I want this world to become greater than it is and in order for that to happen, we must make changes." Looking to Richard, she smiled with his nod, a silent conversation. "The changes begin with our marriage," she added as she brought her eyes back to Martha, who had sat back down in her chair, defeated. "Our lands will unite and our army strengthened beyond all others."

"Is there anything else you wish to change?" the other woman asked coldly.

"I believe a new Head of Council should be named," Richard replied instantly. No one gave pause or hesitation to his words, many even appearing to be pleased. He had heard Kahlan speak of every member of the Council; listened to her as she had once come to the same conclusion he spoke of. Out of the twelve members, there had only been one in which the Mother Confessor and himself had thought to be the best candidate and she sat in the lowest seat of them all. "Jessica," he said clearly, shocking everyone else in the room.

All eyes came to the smallest woman in the room, the second youngest and the prettiest. She had long dark hair, the strands falling just below her shoulders as she stared at the couple in confusion. "Me?"

"Yes," Kahlan said with a smile. "We have discussed it for many weeks." Turning her head slightly, she met the eyes of the angriest woman. "Martha," she said sternly. "You have until the end of the day to leave the palace. Jessica, if you would like time to adjust and make plans, we can postpone the next meeting."

"I don't believe that would be wise, we have had many complaints on the food supply, many of our people may not survive the wait," she whispered as she stood up.

"Very well," Kahlan responded with a smile.

"Mother Confessor, may I suggest something?"

"Of course."

Looking to Richard, the other woman smiled. "If the two of you are to be married and your lands united, he should be there, too."

"You're right, he should."

Grinning, the Seeker beamed. "I wouldn't miss it."

Amari began to stir in her mother's arms, a soft mumble escaping her before Kahlan brought her closer and began to sway. "Are you hungry?" she whispered with a wide smile, looking into her daughters eyes for a moment.

As the couple turned to leave, Jessica hurried to the door. "Mother Confessor, I wanted to thank you for this opportunity, both of you. Thank you." Smiling, she looked from one to the other. "I'm excited to see the world the two of you create."

******The End******


End file.
